


Get off my back

by GreenQueenofClubs



Category: Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol (2011), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Dinosaur game, F/M, Hugs all around, Humor, I swear, M/M, Stable AU, You will love it, attempts at humor, friendships, stupid fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-03
Updated: 2013-02-05
Packaged: 2017-11-28 01:37:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 23,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/668794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenQueenofClubs/pseuds/GreenQueenofClubs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SHIELD stable is the best in the New York region. Really, Darcy, recently arrived from New Mexico, would have expected it to be a little less crazy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So here is a stable AU. This fic is the most self-indulging I’ve ever written. I’ve been ridding since I was ten, so the settings and a few horses are deeply inspired by the ones I am familiar with. Of course the characters are not inspired of people I know, because, well FANFIC. So yeah. The SHIELD stable is specialized in Dressage, if you’re curious about what it looks like; I’ve put a link in my profile. Otherwise I’ve kept the descriptions to a minimum, not to be boring, so simply tell it’s something between Gymnastics and Dance. ON a horse. It’s great.
> 
> Part 2 will be up on Tuesday, and then it'll be done!
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy.

Darcy bounced along the earth and gravel path, eyes up in the air, taking everything in. The air was crisp as it only was in fall, refreshing and comforting. The trees were not yet fully colored, a few patches of yellowish leaves catching the light over her head. She was clutching her bag's strap tightly. As familiar as the scene was, though she had never been here, she couldn't help but feel a bit twitchy.

 

The barn in front of her was staring at her, doors  open despite the slight coolness of the air. There were a few horses in different pastures, eating calmly, unconcerned. Finally she got close enough to breathe in the smell, and she felt something unknot in her chest. Despite everything that had happened, she had missed this, terribly. She wanted to go and see the horses, but she had been taught to never go toward horses she didn't know.

 

Just outside the door, she paused, just for a second, just for a breath. A deep, bracing breath. Just the time to convince herself to take the first step.

 

Finally, she set her foot on the hard cement floor. The alley was dimly lit, still relying on the natural sun. It was clean, though it had the same dusty quality most stables had, no matter how much you cleaned it.

 

The main alley was surrounded by two rows of stalls, half wooden and half metal bars that reached to the ceiling. She could see another door at the other end of it. There were chains to tie the horses, and a broom lying across the way. She smiled. It was so heartwarming, so natural. So everything her old stable was before the troubles started.

 

A few doors were open, curious faces staring at her, ears pointed toward her. She smiled hesitantly at them, looking around, to see if someone was nearby. When she called, she'd been told someone would be there to give her a tour, but she couldn't see anyone. She walked gingerly in, craning her neck to see everything.

 

She stopped beside a sweet faced light gray horse, seeing an abandoned wheelbarrow about a stall down. She let her bag slid down to the ground. The horse went to nuzzle the bars, pushing it in between, batting its eyes at her. She smiled, and looked at the door's plate.

 

"Hey, Bastet?"

 

The mare didn't answer, but looked steadily at Darcy. Finally, the brunette relented and petted the offered nose gently. When the horse's pushed back into it, she smiled and went to scratch her forehead. They stayed there for a few moments, the mare providing a very welcomed distraction from her angst.

 

What if they forgot about her?

 

What if they didn't want her here?

 

Oh, hush Darcy. Everything would be fine. The mare huffed, as if agreeing. Darcy grinned helplessly at her.

 

Suddenly, there was a loud clatter farther in the stable. She heard a shout, then the unforgettable sound of canter. Darcy frowned and turned toward the noise. Her hand slid to the mare's nose, but the horse wasn't paying any attention to her, focused on whatever was happening.

 

Suddenly, from a hallway Darcy hadn't noticed, a small ball of fur barged out, delicate hoofs sliding on the slippery floor. Darcy's eyebrows flew to her hairline, and she remained frozen on her spot, as the pony ran toward her. It was barely three feet tall, thick mane and tail flowing behind it.

 

Suddenly it realized she was there, ear pointed toward her, a worrying glint in its dark eyes. Darcy wondered if she should move, but she knew it could easily outrun her, and would probably see her running as an incentive.

 

Suddenly the pony lowered its head and charged. Just before it reached her, he slowed down, hitting her with just enough strength to push her to the ground without actually hurting her.

 

She fell on her bottom, and stared as the pony automatically went to nuzzle her cheek and neck. She froze, and slowly went to card her fingers through its mane. It sighed and let its head drop lazily.

 

"Odysseus!"

 

The pony didn't move, but Darcy raised her head to see a man running toward them. He stopped just as he reached them, cheeks red and short of breath. Darcy couldn't help but stare.

 

He was a bit short, but his shoulders were impossibly broad, and she would die for those _arms._ His short spiky hair was a bit damp, a few strands sticking to his forehead. The tight white t-shirt was doing him all kind of favors.

 

" _Hello..._ "

 

The man grinned, and slapped the pony's croup.

 

"Stop flirting, you."

 

The pony sighed, and moved, to stand by the man's side. He turned toward Darcy, faint smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.

 

"Darcy Lewis?"

 

She nodded, still on the floor, staring up at him.

 

"Yep, that's me. And you are?"

 

He offered her a hand, which she took. He dragged her up effortlessly, and smiled even wider. She returned it in spades, as flirty as she could without being slutty. She worked for a long while to find that delicate balance, but she knew she had nailed it. The blond didn't seem particularly affected though.

 

"Clint Barton. I'm supposed to show you around."

 

She arched an eyebrow at him, crossing her arms under her bosom.

 

"A bit late there, cowboy."

 

He took a step back, and patted  the pony lightly on the neck.

 

"Had to stop a jailbreak. Darcy, here is Odysseus. If you see him running around, it's fine."

 

She looked fleetingly at the pony.

 

"Am I supposed to catch him?"

 

Clint chuckled.   "Nope, that's my job."  He looked down at Odysseus.  "Go, you have two hours."

 

The pony whinnied happily and trotted out. Darcy turned her wide eyes toward Clint. He snorted, and gave her a once over. She was a little disappointed that he didn't even give her boobs a second glance. Her boobs were a work of art, but he didn't seem particularly impressed.

 

"What was that about?"

 

Clint shrugged. "We gave up in keeping him in a stall years ago. He knows to stay around, and I run after him when I need him."

 

Darcy felt her mouth open and close a few times, before she nodded. Seriously, letting  a pony run around like that? She never saw, or heard, of something like that.

 

Clint smirked at her disbelief.  "He's a good pony, great with kids. If we need to leave him free to come and go to keep him in a good mood, why the hell not? Puts some life in the place. It's pretty dead during the day."

 

He gestured around to the deserted alley, and Darcy nodded.  "Right. Are you always alone in here?"  She couldn't help the slight purr and the cheeky grin.

 

Clint shook his head.  "No, Coulson comes by a lot, except when Fury needs him for something else. They're out looking at a horse right now."

 

If Darcy recalled right, Mr. Coulson was the main teacher, and Fury was the owner of the stable. So, right now, they were truly alone. She took a step forward to crowd Clint a bit, looking up to his mouth.

 

"Must be great when you need to take a break, to --relax-- a bit..."

 

She put a light hand on his bicep. His eyes glazed over for a second, an unreadable smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. His voice was a bit rough when he answered.

 

"Yeah. Yeah it is."

 

She wanted to lean toward him, but he smoothly stepped back, smiling easily at her.

 

"Come on, let's show you around."

 

Darcy hid her disappointment as well as she could. She couldn't get a read on the man, and it was bugging her. She still trailed behind him as he ventured deeper into the building. Bastet let out a huff and went back to her meal. Clint was gesturing around.

 

"On the left side are the Owner's horses, the horses that belong to people. On the right side, they belong to the stable. We also have a few ponies, but they spend most of their time outside."

 

He turned around, walking backward to talk to her face.

 

"I can't put you on a horse myself, Coulson doesn't trust me. He should be here in an hour or two, I hope you don't mind."

 

Darcy shrugged, and grinned saucily at him.

 

"I'm sure I'll find something to keep myself busy with..."

 

His smirk turned deeply entertained, but he turned back just in time to steer them to the left in the hallway Odysseus had come from earlier. He stopped in front of a door on their right, and opened it, ushering her inside.

 

"This is  the equipment room, each horse has his own bridle, and the saddles are numbered. Coulson will tell you which one he wants you to use when he tells you who you're riding. The toilet is right there in the back. We frequently have toilet paper shortages and we want to apologize in advance. You probably should bring your own just in case."

 

Darcy nodded dutifully. Clint looked over his shoulder.

 

"Be sure to wash your mouth piece and to put everything right back were you got it from. Coulson hates disorder, and you'll probably pay for it during your lessons. You don't want lessons with a frustrated Coulson. You'll discover new muscles, and not in a nice way."

 

Darcy rolled her eyes. Yeah, she’d seen this  song and dance before, thank you very much. She stuffed her hands into her jeans pockets.

 

"I thought Mister Fury was the Big Booboo around here?"

 

Clint seemed to be holding back his laughter by his very fingernails.  "Big Booboo?"

 

Darcy huffed and glared at him.  "Sue me, I have weird parents."

 

The man didn't even bother to restrain his laughter this time around. Darcy snickered in sympathy, and kept looking intently at Clint until he got that she was expecting an answer at some point.

 

"Fury's not really into micro managing. He probably won't bother learning your name until Coulson deemed you competition material."

 

Darcy arched her eyebrows, unimpressed, and drawled smoothly.

 

"Sorry to be the one to break that into you, Hot Stuff, but I'm _already_ competition material."

 

Barton snorted at that, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, his eyes sparkling with amusement--and sadly, nothing else.

 

"Sorry to be the one to break that into you, baby girl, but you clearly have never met Phil Coulson."

 

She smiled at the opportunity, and leaned forward.

 

"Maybe I'll need moral support..."

 

Suddenly a shrill beeping was heard, and Clint leaped away, fishing for his phone in his back pocket. He shot a single look at the screen, and put it away again. He looked up at Darcy.

 

"Coulson says he'll be there in about fifteen minutes, I hope that's all right with you. I have to go back to my stalls now, I'm sorry."

 

She shrugged.  "I can help if you want..."

 

Clint snorted and shook his head.  "You're as subtle as a train wreck, you know that? Seriously!"

 

Darcy was about to open her mouth to explain about the efficiency of her method, but he interrupted her before she could.

 

"And I really don't want to lead you on, so I'm going to state right away that I am taken. Very happily so. And you are missing some mandatory equipment to really interest me, even if I wasn't."

 

Darcy stood for a moment, mouth hanging open, as she processed what he’d said. Then she sighed, and stomped her foot in frustration.  "Why is it always the good ones!?!"

 

Clint had the nerve to laugh at her, and punch her shoulder lightly.  "Because only the best of us realize how fun guns are to play with."

 

Darcy rolled her eyes again, and turned away, escaping toward the toilet. Barton called after her, voice bright and happy.

 

"If you see Odysseus, tell him Coulson isn't happy with him!"

 

She didn't dignify that with an answer, instead locking herself in.. She let herself fall on the bowl, and took a few deep breathes in.

 

This was going better than she’d thought it would. She didn't make too much of a fool of herself, and the only person she met  seemed nice. Any guy willing to tell her _before_ she was completely crushing on him that he wasn't available was A-Okay with her.

 

Still, she took a few minutes to appreciate the fact that no major catastrophes had befallen her. She waited until she felt she could face Coulson. When she emerged, she walked back to the main alley, Clint still appeared to be alone, busy cleaning a stall. She walked to him, a bit more hesitant.

 

"Hey? I hope I'm not bothering you..."

 

Clint smiled as he stopped. He put his fork on the wall, swiping his brow with the back of his hand.

 

"I'm always terribly bothered by hot chicks who throw themselves at me."

 

Darcy rolled her eyes at him, and leaned on the side of the stall, but couldn't help but feeling slightly bad.

 

"You must think I'm a bitch."

 

Clint snickered, and took back the fork, looking for filth. The tall thin horse in the corner of the box was staring at her, looking wary. Once in a while he would glare at Clint, flattening its ears at him. The stable boy looked supremely unconcerned, certain that whatever threat the black animal was trying to send his way wouldn't be followed through.

 

"Nothing bad in knowing what you like, babe. Can't blame you for that."

 

Darcy laughed, and felt the uneasiness dissipate.  "Well, aren't you adorable?"

 

Clint leaned briefly toward her, cheeky smirk stretched wide on his face, taking a moment to ostensibly flex his arms.  "Excuse you, I'm _goddamn_ adorable."

 

Darcy chuckled, excited to know that friendly flirting was still in the cards. She always liked that. Especially when she could get people confused about it. Some of the best relationships she had were completely fake and illusory. And yes, she was aware of how depressing that sounded.

 

"Yeah, ok. So who's your buddy?"

 

She jerked her chin toward the horse, who lowered his ears in answer. She stuck her tongue out at it and it huffed, looking away. When she looked back at Clint, the man was watching her. bemused. She raised her eyebrows at him and he shook his head.

 

"That Boreas. Don't worry. He's all bark and no bite. Poor little thing. Hasn't had an easy life, but he's a damn good horse."

 

She nodded, and crossed her arms  over her chest.

 

"So except the Big Boss I won’t hear from and The Slightly Clean Freak Coulson, who else should I know?"

 

Clint took a moment to think, leaning on his fork to look at her.

 

"Well, there’s Hill. She's the Pony Club Master and the best rider in this place. If you see a thin woman with a tight bun and a look that will drive armies into surrender, that's her. Don't get in her way and she'll like you just fine. Otherwise, everyone's pretty cool."

 

Darcy nodded, and Clint must have seen her apprehension, because he leaned forward with warm eyes.

 

"Don't worry, doll face, I'll protect you against the big bad wolf."

 

Darcy was about to answer--something about being able to handle herself--when a calm and unimpressed voice cut in.

 

"I'm pretty sure we aren't paying you to flirt, Barton."

 

They both turned toward the voice, and Darcy smiled widely at the newcomer, a middle aged unassuming man. He was looking solely at Clint, though.

 

The blond grinned cheekily at the older man.  "I'm sorry, sir, but it gave such good result in the past."

 

Darcy was impressed by the older man’s unimpressed stare. She had never seen such a penetrating unimpressed stare. In fact, she was pretty sure that stare should be studied. She knew _she_ was going to study it. Clint didn't seem to be affected, but then again, maybe he was used to it.

 

 The unknown man simply sighed.  "Did you at least wash the buckets?"

 

Clint shrugged helplessly, smile completely unabashed.

 

"Couldn't, Ody stole my sponge."

 

The man with the receding hairline glared at him some more.   "And you couldn't go and get another?"

 

Clint's grin was completely shit eating.  "He took that one too."

 

The other man sighed and clearly resisted rubbing his forehead.  "Why are we humoring that demon again?"

 

Clint laughed, and went pack to scraping the floor of the stall.  "Because he's awesome and Hill would castrate you if you even touched her dear pony."

 

The blond finally noticed that Darcy had no idea what was going on. He looked at her and gestured between them.

 

"Darcy, Phil Coulson. Boss, Darcy Lewis."

 

The man turned toward her, offering her a hand with a smile so perfectly polite and amiable that it had to be as rehearsed as often as the unimpressed stare. She shook it, unsure what she should say. He thankfully took the lead.

 

"It's a pleasure to meet you at last, Miss Lewis."

 

"Likewise, sir."

 

His lips twitched, just a bit, and he let go of her hand, clasping his hands in front of him.

 

"I heard about you when you were still riding with the Puerto Stables. I hope you will find our stable more enjoyable."

 

Darcy couldn't help but snort at that.  "What, the South H--"

 

He cut her, smiling almost despite himself.  "Just call us S.H.I.E.L.D. Stables."

 

Darcy nodded, and looked around.  "I'm glad you gave me a shot."

 

Coulson smiled, and gestured her forward, leaving Clint behind them with a, "That's it, leave me for the cute girl!". She couldn't help but throw a look at the other man's profile. He caught her and smiled blandly, and she wondered why he was so guarded, and if he ever thawed out.

 

"Today will be a simple ride, just so you get your bearings. I won't judge your worth on what happens, god knows a first ride isn't always easy."

 

Darcy nodded, not sure what she was supposed to say. She hated being tongue tied, but she never knew what to say to this kind of person, the ones that were so good at hiding what they thought that she couldn't get a read on them. She'd have to ask Clint about Coulson.

 

The older man brought her to the equipment room.  "You'll be riding Bastet today, she has a similar personality to the horse you described to me, you should get along fine."

 

OOOOOOOOO

 

"Don't worry so much about it; it's only the first ride!"

 

"I made a complete fool of myself!"

 

Clint sighed, and leaned on the wall beside her while she brushed Bastet, trying her hardest not to be too rough. It wasn't really the mare's fault.

 

"Everyone falls once in a while."

 

Darcy turned angrily to face him.

 

"I was supposed to show I'm worth taking as a student here. No way Coulson's taking me now."

 

Clint's lips thinned, and crossed his arms over his chest. It was a tribute to how jittery she was that she didn't even stare at him.

 

"Why don't you let him decide  that?"

 

Darcy pursed her lips and scowled at him.  "He nearly ran away as soon as he was done with me."

 

Clint threw his head back and barked a laugh.  "That's why you've been tying yourself in knots, babe? No, he ran away because he had to fix one of Stark's messes, again."

 

Darcy's shoulders relaxed a bit, but she made sure the look she threw at Clint conveyed all the skepticism she felt.  "First, is it impossible to kill two birds with one stone, and are we talking about Tony Stark?"

 

Clint grinned wickedly.  "Yes, we are. And the last time Coulson evaluated a rider he didn't judge suitable, he took fifteen minutes to expose what was wrong what he should work on and how. Trust me, if he hasn't said anything today, it's because he figures he'll have time to do it at some other point."

 

Darcy blinked at him for a good minute, before deciding there was no point in arguing with the man. He obviously knew more about Coulson and the way this stable worked than she did. She started waving her fore finger at him.  "On the off chance that I believe you, which is not to say I do, can we go back to the part about Tony Stark?"

 

Clint snorted and rolled his eyes.  "Why is everyone always saying that? Am I not interesting enough for you?"

 

Darcy rolled her eyes back at him, cocking her hips out.  "You're taken, hot stuff."

 

Clint shook his head at her.  "And all of the sudden, I'm nothing more than a carpet for people to step on."

 

Darcy laughed, and went back to Bastet, who had been making increasingly impatient noises in the last moments. She caressed the mare's grey hair, and continued where she’d left off in her brushing. The horse sighed in happiness, and went lax under the brush. Darcy chuckled and continued her work.

 

"So?"

 

"So what?"

 

She shot Clint a brief look over her shoulder, and he offered her innocent eyes in return. He finally relented and opened his mouth.

 

"Stark's been riding here since before Fury bought to whole place, so yeah..."

 

Darcy went to put down her brush, rubbing her hands on her pants.  "But why would _Coulson_ going out to fix his mess? Are they related or something?"

 

Clint shook his head, smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.  "Nope. We have a rotation. I'm on Wednesday, I think."

 

Darcy stared at him, trying to determine whether or not he was kidding or not.  "A rotation?"

 

He nodded earnestly, eyes wide. Darcy felt the need to confirm she understood write.  "You, a stable boy, are on a rotation of people to fix the messes of one of the richest man in the country?"

 

Clint clutched his chest in mock hurt, gasping at her.  "How dare you? I'm perfectly able to help a friend!"

 

Darcy arched and eyebrow, stuffing her hands into her pockets.  "I'd be more concerned that you'd join in whatever he was doing."

 

Clint shrugged.  "Coulson cut the expenses out of my salary, and I really don't earn enough to spare the money. So yes, I'm on the rotation."

 

Darcy briefly considered asking what he did, but decided to keep her plausible deniability. If her younger brother taught her anything, was that it was best not to know anything that could get her into trouble, or make her look like an accomplice. That, and always have a good 'innocent' face. That could get you out of trouble faster than any alibi.

 

"And who's on the rotation?"

 

Clint shrugged again.  "Anyone who's considered able to control Stark. At the beginning, it was only Pepper and Rodhey, but it’s expanded ever since. Thank god. Some of us are better at it. You'll never catch Stark doing anything on Maria's or Tasha's days, no matter that he's not supposed to know which days those are. There's-"

 

Darcy tried not to look too lost, because she had honestly no idea who Clint was talking about, but it had to show somehow on her face anyway, because Clint interrupted himself and looked a bit sheepish, rubbing the back of his head with one hand.

 

"And you don't know any of them. Of course you don't. Are you free tomorrow?"

 

Darcy's eyes widened, not understanding where he was going with that, but willing to follow for a while.

 

"I am?"

 

Clint beamed.

 

"Come around! The rest of the gang should be there, I'll get you introduced!"

 

Darcy frowned, and went to speak, but the blond interrupted her.

 

"You know, if everyone likes you, it might influence Coulson."

 

She looked at him.  "No it won't."

 

Clint considered it.  "No it won't. But come on! You gotta come!"

 

Darcy pondered it, and really, if there was a chance she really was going to be accepted here, she’d better know the crowd.

 

"Fine."

 

Clint laughed and wrapped his arms around her, spinning her around.

 

"Everyone'll love you!"

 

She simply laughed and swatted on his shoulder until he took pity on her and put her down. Maybe she _could_ do this.

 

OOOOOOOO

 

It didn't keep her from slightly freaking out the morning after, as she skipped on the dirt path.

 

Who was she kidding? She was freaking the hell out.

 

 This was a bad idea. She was going to make a fool of herself again. She always did.

 

Maybe Clint was only tricking her.

 

Stupid girl. Clint wasn't Loki.

 

Why couldn't he be, though? She didn't know him.

 

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice she had reached the building until someone called after her.

 

"Darcy? Darce! Babe!"

 

She finally computed, and she jumped around to face Clint. She couldn't help but answer his beam. He seemed relieved that she’d shown up. Her uncertainty must have more obvious than she thought. She walked briskly to him, and proceeded to try and hug the crap out of him. He froze for a moment, taken by surprise, but returned it without a question, for which her pride and nerves were grateful.

 

"Hey Barton! Don't hog all the hot chicks!"

 

Clint threw his head over his shoulder and shouted back,  "Fuck off, Stark!"

 

Darcy eagerly leaned back, and stared at the dark haired man standing in the stable's doorway. He smirked at her and waved cheekily. She answered, balanced on one foot, trusting Clint to not let her fall on the ground. The blond rolled his eyes and dragged her upright again, blocking her view with his chest. He gave her a stern look that was only half believable.  "No, Darcy."

 

She batted innocent eye lashes at him.  "What?"

 

He mock frowned at her.  "No. Just no."

 

She pouted at him, putting on her best Puss in Boots look.  "But he's Tony Stark!"

 

Clint stuffed his hands in his jean's pockets, pouting miserably.  "And yesterday you were _so_ into me! He doesn't deserve to be the rebound guy."

 

She huffed indignantly, and jabbed at his sternum with her fore finger.  "Fuck off, Blondie", she pointed at his face, "You're gay," she pointed at his chest toward were she thought Stark would be, "He's not. I know enough to understand which of you I have a chance with."

 

Clint rolled his eyes at her, but wasn't able to rein in his smirk.  "You don't know where he's been."

 

Darcy giggled and leaned forward until she had a very nice view of his chin.  "No glove, no love, Hot Stuff."

 

"Jesus, are you really going to tap that, Barton? Because I don't think the boyfriend will approve, unless he's into-"  "Go to Hell, Stark."

 

Darcy smiled at the billionaire whose head at just popped a few feet behind Clint's left bicep, looking at her like she was a curiosity. The brunette waved at him again, smirking evilly. He answered promptly, a glint in his eyes she knew she would like. A lot. Clint looked between them before chuckling.

 

"You two are going to be a damn menace to this place, right?"

 

Tony bounced to Darcy and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, facing Barton.  "Yep! You want in?"

 

Barton laughed, and shook his head as he headed back inside.  "Thanks but no thanks, Coulson takes every damage out of my salary."

 

Tony smirked.  "I bet he does."

 

Darcy couldn't stop staring at Stark. The man raised a questioning eyebrow at her.

 

"I am wondering where the bunch of you learnt the concept of personal space."

 

Stark smirked lasciviously.  "Do you mind? You certainly didn’t seem to with Barton."

 

She answered, "Not at all, Pretty Boy."

 

Clint pinched her side.  "Careful, he'll take you seriously."

 

Darcy beamed at Tony.  "Awesome! Can I say you like being called 'Neo' in bed when I give my interview?"

 

Tony and Clint both stared at her, puzzled. Stark was the first one to speak.

 

"Interview?"

 

She huffed with a dismissive hand.  "No way I'm giving _you_ access to my lady parts if I can't get a TV interview out of it!"

 

She slipped from under the billionaire's arm and into the stable. Clint jogged until he was beside her. He stuffed his hands into his pockets, relaxed. Tony was let behind, complaining about needing new friends. Darcy spared a brief look at Clint.  "That's the reason I was dumped yesterday?"

 

Clint shrugged, amused smirk tugging his lips.  "It wasn't too bad. Coulson said he'd be by at some point."

 

Darcy nodded, and couldn't help but feel a bit nervous. Clint rolled his eyes and punched her on the shoulder, hard. She clutched it, looking at him indignantly.  "OWW!"

 

He looked completely unrepentant.  "Focus on that, and stop worrying."

 

He grabbed her arm and dragged her towards the other end of the stable. Darcy went with it, a bit curious despite herself.

 

The S.H.I.E.L.D. Stables had an impeccable reputation, and she was wondering who would be riding there. She wasn't a regular of the New York circuit, so she hadn't actually met any of them. As far as she was concerned, Tony Stark fit the style, though she would have expected the members of the team to be more... disciplined. Balanced. The kind that trained eight hours a day and ate only green vegetables and whole grains.

 

Another thing she had been nervous about, at being here. And they exited the building into the back, where she could see a few Dressage Rings. Right in front of her, though, were two picnic tables, in sturdy non painted wood, probably even homemade.

 

There was four people sprawled over them, enjoying the late fall sun and warmth. Clint didn't let go of her arm until she was right in front of them. Darcy smiled and waved to them, too.

 

The first woman on the left was a strawberry blond she recognized as Pepper Potts, Tony Stark's famous PA, and honestly someone she would never have expected to meet, ever in her life. The woman simply gave her a small smile before returning her attention to her phone.

 

The next one next to her was a gorgeous red head, lying on the table, her tank top rolled just under her bra. Her skin was deadly pale, but turned almost golden in the yellow light.

 

She was talking to a tiny scrawny little boy. He looked about sixteen, with a kind, innocent face and perfectly combed blond hair. He turned his baby blue eyes towards her and smiled shyly, turning a bit pink in the face as she stared.

 

If it was wrong to want to jump over there and hug him for the rest of her life, she didn't want to be right.

 

The last one sitting was a scruffy man in his late twenties, with curly brown hair and twitchy face. He held her gaze for a second before looking away and tugging at the hem of his shirt.

 

She really wanted to hug him too. Before she could act on any of her impulses though, Tony walked past her and draped himself over the curly haired man. Clint wrapped an arm around her shoulder and whistled. Everyone turned toward her.

 

"Everyone, this is Darcy Lewis! Be nice to her, I hear she bites."

 

Darcy hit him on the shoulder, forcing him to step away for a moment.  "Go to hell, Barton. What am I? A cave woman? I don't bite. I taze."

 

She crossed her arms under her chest, and smiled when Stark's and the little blonde’s eyes were drawn to it. Tony ogled shamelessly, but the small one turned away immediately, blushed a deep, beet red.

 

Oh yeah. She wanted to keep him. He would make an amazing teddy bear.

 

Clint, the bastard he was, barked a laugh.  "Darcy, here is the S.H.I.E.L.D. stable’s competition team." He pointed to the red head, "Natasha Romanov, she rides Boreas, Steve Rogers, he rides Bastet," that was the tiny one, "Bruce Banner, he has Goliath." that was the curly-haired one, "Tony Stark, you know, he has his own horse, Hephaestus. We're only missing Hill. She rides Mercury."

 

Darcy waved at them again, and Tony and Steve answered. Bruce looked speculative, Pepper calmly put her phone away and smiled again, and Natasha simply gave her a blank look and closed her eyes.

 

Okay then, nice to meet you too.

 

She was about to say something--she wasn't sure what, she was never really good at thinking before talking--but she was certainly opening her mouth when she was interrupted.

 

"Miss Lewis?"

 

Everyone but Natasha turned around, towards Coulson, who was standing in the doorway. Darcy smiled at him.

 

"Yeah, sir?"

 

He smiled blandly at her, as polite as he had been yesterday.

 

"Can I have a word?"

 

She threw a wondering glance at Clint, and he pushed her lightly towards the older man. She stuffed her hands into her back pockets. When she got level with, him he simply turned and walked toward the equipment room. She sniffed and followed him. Finally, he closed the door and faced her. Darcy barely kept herself from sneering.

 

"What’s with the Big Secret Gig, sir? Brought me here to kill me?"

 

He sighed, and looked at her.

 

"I apologize for my hasty departure yesterday, Miss Lewis. I should have talked to you before."

 

She nodded, looking around.

 

"It's fine, Clint told me about Stark."

 

Coulson nodded.

 

"Nevertheless, it wasn't right of me, and I thought we should have this discussion in private."

 

She nodded again, a weary feeling climbing up her throat.

 

"Is that so?"

 

His gaze turned a bit softer, and she swallowed.

 

"I need you to understand, S.H.I.E.L.D. Stables have very high standards, very hard to meet. And I'm sorry, but I don't think you can make the team."

 

Darcy felt the disappointment crush her, and she looked away. She blinked a few times, not willing to cry in front of the man that wore self-control like armor. She nodded, and was happy to notice her voice didn't break.

 

"It's okay, I'll try somewhere else."

 

Coulson cleared his throat.

 

"If it's what you wish."

 

She turned around, confused.

 

"You just said I wasn't competition material."

 

He clasped his hands in front of himself, and smiled gently.

 

"Yes, but that doesn't mean I'm not ready to take you as a student. You have talent, and I would be interested in developing it."

 

Darcy tried to wrap her head around it, and failed a few time.

 

"As a student."

 

He nodded.

 

"Yes. However, if your desire is to compete, I would be very happy to write to a few  other respectable stables in the region to recommend you."

 

Darcy blinked. She was never that fond of competing, but everywhere she rode, enlisting on the big team was the only way to have attention and good coaching.  If Coulson really was proposing was she thought he was, why the hell not.

 

"One condition."

 

He cocked his head with an inquiring arch of his eyebrow. She smiled at him.

 

"I want to know when you're on Stark duty. Just in case Clint isn't around to set my head straight."

 

Coulson's lips quirked for a fraction of second, which was more expression than she ever saw on his face. He offered his hand, which she shook with gusto. His voice was a little smug when he said "Welcome to the S.H.I.E.L.D. Stables, Miss Lewis."

 

She snorted at the corniness of the line.

 

"Next you're going to tell me I can't talk about this to anyone and show me your super weapon caches."

 

He only cocked an eyebrow.

 

"The caches are for the one year anniversary."

 

She laughed and let go of his hand to saunter back to the door. Just as she was about to escape she turned around.

 

"I want to be someone's groom."

 

He merely looked at her.

 

"You'll have to bring it up with the team, Miss Lewis."

 

She nodded and turned around again, humming happily.  Just as she exited the room, she felt something heavy hit her behind the knees. She caught herself on the wall just in time, and turned around to see the little ball of fur of a pony standing behind her. He seemed to be a moment away from sticking out his tongue in glee.

 

"Hey Ody? You mind if I call you Ody? 'cause Odysseus is really a mouth full."

 

"You should be careful not to get too familiar with him, or you'll end up on his hit list."

 

She turned around briefly to shoot a look at Coulson who was looking at the small pony like it was the devil. Darcy snorted.

 

"Will do, sir."

 

Then she carded her fingers through the pony's thick mane and tugged toward the door.

 

"Come on, soft kitty, let's go see the others."

 

She got back out with the pony hot on her heels. Ody's eyes lit up when he saw Tony, and immediately charged towards the billionaire. Stark squeaked in a _very_ manlymanner, and jumped away, starting running circles around the tables. Clint looked up from where he was talking to Natasha and smiled encouragingly at her. The red head still looked blank, but there was some sort of expectancy underneath it. The others were too busy laughing at Tony to pay attention to her. Clint pressed on a bit.

 

"So?"

 

Darcy did her best not to show her disappointment, because no matter how much not doing competition wasn't that much of a big deal to her, being told she wasn't good enough was a feeling she was all too familiar with, and that for some really annoying reason, never seemed to get less painful.

 

"I am the new S.H.I.E.L.D. Groom! Ready to serve!"

 

"Groom!?!"

 

She turned toward Tony who had stopped dead on his tracks like a dog who saw a squirrel. Sadly, Ody didn't and tackled him fully forward, sending the genius rolling in the grass gasping for breath. Before he could get another word out, they heard a sharp "Dibs."

 

They all looked at Natasha with wide eyes. She arched an eyebrow in return, stretching her arms high above her head.

 

"I could use the help."

 

Clint was looking at her incredulously.

 

"You hate grooms! You say they never do anything right!"

 

Natasha shrugged.

 

"She deserves a chance. And Coulson seemed to like her."

 

Darcy tried to open her mouth, but was cut off by Bruce.

 

"You can't claim a groom all for yourself."

 

He didn't seem to want her himself. Tony let out a strangled "Help!" from where Ody seemed for them happy to lick his face as clean as it could get and check his pockets over and over again in case a carrot finally achieved personal teleportation.

 

He was ignored by all. Darcy tried to intervene again, but Natasha beat her to it again.

 

"Don't be ridiculous, she'll help Steve too."

 

The skinny little blond frowned, looking slightly insulted and looked up to Natasha in  as dignified of a manner as he could.

 

"I don't suppose I get a say in this?"

 

Natasha smiled sweetly at him.  "No you don't."

 

Darcy frowned and crossed her arms under her chest.  "Me neither, I guess?"

 

Not that she minded helping Steve at all, in fact she'd like to bring him home and wrap him in bubble wrap and leave him inside to make sure he stayed safe because it wasn't right to be that pale. However, Natasha scared her a bit, and she wasn't sure the red head wouldn’t make her scrub all her leathers with an old tooth brush simply for the sake of it.

 

Clint looked at her with a smirk.  "Sorry babe, slaves don't get to vote."

 

She rolled her eyes at him, and decided that she was going to sit with them, no matter what they thought. Clint turned back to Natasha.

 

"And seriously, why can't I never get the groom, seriously, it'd be nice to have someone else to clean for me for once."

 

Darcy shrugged at him, arching an eyebrow.  "Because you're not part of the competition team?"

 

Pepper's, Natasha's, Steve's and Bruce's stared automatically jumped to her before turning to glare at Clint, who was suddenly very interested in the apple he was playing with. Tony appeared between Bruce and Steve, finally freed from Ody, who was trotting away cheerily.

 

"What's going on?"

 

Steve answered his voice a bit harder than a moment before.

 

"Clint forgot to mention he was on the team."

 

Tony sighed and slumped on the table, boneless.  "Ah fuck, we're going to talk about feelings again. Go to hell, man."

 

He sent what must have been a kick under the table at Clint, from the growl the blond aimed at the billionaire. Pepper flicked Tony's ear and Natasha hissed at Clint.

 

"I thought we went over this-"

 

"We did."

 

"You are part of this team as much as-"

 

"Oh come on, Nat-"

 

"You're the best at what you do-"

 

"I know! But-"

 

"Why can't you see it?"

 

Clint rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

 

"I just don't play on the same level as the rest of you."

 

Natasha sneers at him.

 

"Without you, we'd never be as good-"

 

He groaned.

 

"Cut the 'angle stone' bullshit."

 

Darcy felt herself looking between the both of them like a tennis match spectator, before she gave in and looked at the others to see if one of them would be ready to enlighten her. Bruce caught her eyes and smiled with a little shrug.

 

"Clint trains the young horses, or the one that come here with problems. He helps them get better, bring them to their first shows, then pass them to others, so he usually stays in the smaller levels."

 

Darcy nodded her thanks and turned toward the blond who was still arguing with Natasha and hit him hard upside the head. He whirled around to face her, protest dying on his lips when he took in her face.

 

"You. Are an idiot."

 

Between her and Natasha's glares, Clint wisely decided to keep his mouth shut. The red head seemed to ponder something for a moment before rising in a cat-like motion, stretching her back one last time. She stalked toward the stable, and stopped just before entering. She turned her head to look over her shoulder and stared right at Darcy, cocking her eyebrow in a clear 'Are you coming?' way. Darcy looked at the others, but no one was paying attention. Pepper was back to toying with her phone, Steve had produced a sketching pad from somewhere, Clint was trying to be fascinated by his apple, and Tony and Bruce were talking about _something_ in what sounded like five different languages.

 

So she got to her feet and walked behind Natasha, who had turned as soon as she had risen, satisfied she was understood. Darcy had to jog to catch up to her. She sent a hesitant smile Natasha’s way.  "So, how can I help you?"

 

Natasha looked at her for a second, before shaking her head.  "I don't need a groom."

 

Darcy frowned at her. The tone hadn't been aggressive, dismissive or proud like she would have expected it to be. It was calm and blank. Natasha didn't need a groom.

 

"Then why have you asked for a girl you don't like to be your groom?"

 

Natasha's lips curled upward.  "Mine and Steve's. He wouldn't have accepted to have you help only him."

 

Darcy pursed her lips, and braked just in time not to fall face first on Natasha's back, as the woman stopped dead in her tracks. They were just in front of the cases Darcy had seen. Natasha unlocked it, and took out a saddle, a bridle and a brush case. She gestured to Darcy to take her saddle carpet and bomb. The brunette did so, quipping all the while.  "I thought you didn't need a groom."

 

Natasha shrugged, careless.  "Since you're here, might as well make yourself useful."

 

Darcy decided that definitely deserved her sticking out her tongue. Natasha simply smiled.

 

She trailed behind the red head as she led them to Boreas' stall. The dark horse welcomed them with his usual air, but Natasha simply swatted him lightly on the nose, and he stood down a bit. He still glared at Darcy, but did as the older woman asked. The brunette leaned on the stall's wall, looking at Natasha.

 

"Why did you have to trick Steve into accepting

my help?"

 

Natasha didn't look at her as she answered.  "Because he's the only one who really needs it."

 

Darcy didn't answer, expecting Natasha to explain some more. When it was obvious it wasn't going to happen, she pressed a bit.  "Because?"

 

Natasha brushed a lock of bright hair out of her face.  "Steve's health is so bad, it's better for him to rest as much as possible."

 

Darcy frowned.  "Why is he here at all?"

 

Natasha straightened in seconds, turning flaming eyes toward her. Darcy had to resist taking a step back.

 

"Steve is a great rider, and he deserved is place as much as-"

 

Darcy held up her hands, alarmed.  "Woooo, pretty lady, relax. I wasn't implying he wasn't good enough, I was worried it'd be a bit too rough for him."

 

Natasha glared at her for a moment longer before turning back to her horse.

 

"He would go crazy if he couldn't ride. We're all just more careful. Even his horse."

 

Darcy frowned again, crossing her arms.  "Isn't he riding Bastet? She dumped me yesterday!"

 

Natasha smirked.  "She does that to anyone but Steve."

 

Darcy nodded, and looked around.  "So I here to make sure Steve doesn’t exhaust himself."

 

Natasha turned to gaze at her.  "Don't be obvious. He hates when someone reminds him about his condition. God knows Tony does it enough for three."

 

Darcy frowned.  "Tony?"

 

Natasha waved a dismissive hand.  "Long story."

 

Darcy pursed her lips.  "That I'm going to hear nothing about."

 

The red head simply smiled and finished getting her horse ready.

 

Later, as she watched Natasha ride, Darcy understood why Coulson hadn't accepted her on the team. The red head and her horse seemed to work in unison, like one. Like a real team. Sure everything wasn't perfect, even Darcy could spot some mistakes, but Natasha and Boreas seemed to be thinking together about how to solve them, rather than fighting each other, like Darcy had seen all too often. She was leaning on the ring's door, and crossed her arms over it. Coulson wasn't there, and Natasha hadn't asked for her input, apparently still dubious over Darcy's competences, so it was eerily quiet, only disturbed once in a while by a neigh or a loud snort.

 

She felt Clint's presence more than she saw it, the man sliding to copy her posture next to her, eyes on the couple practicing. He spoke quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

"Wasn't that bad, hey?"

 

Darcy arched an eyebrow and didn't answer. Clint certainly wasn’t going to accept that as an answer, and he bumped his shoulder against hers. She shrugged.  "I didn't make the team."

 

He sighed, and wrapped an arm around her shoulder squeezing gently.  "I'm sure you'll be the best groom ever."

 

She huffed.  "Natasha doesn't need my help and Steve apparently doesn't want it."

 

Clint chuckled, and kept his arm where it was.  "Natasha will teach you her tricks to deal with Steve's and the team's ego and pride, don't worry. You'll do great."

 

Darcy smiled ruefully and turned her head to look briefly at the blond's profile. He was watching her from the corner of his eyes.  "Why would they listen to me?"

 

Clint grinned, and turned to face her.  "Because being part of the S.H.I.E.L.D. team isn't about whether or not you're competing."

 

OOOOOOOO

 

Darcy had been riding at the stables for a couple of weeks, and she wasn't aware she could be pushed that hard. Coulson was a ruthless teacher, always pressing her for more. After Bastet, she tried Boreas, who was so sensible she felt like she was riding a live wire, and Goliath, who was so stiff and tense she ached all over for the rest of the week.

 

She was just brushing Bastet after a good lesson, despite having met the sand of the ring a bit too close for her comfort once more. She still hadn't figured what happened between the moment she was in control, and the one where she found herself on the floor. She would understand how the little vixen did it, at some point.

 

"Hey Lewis."

 

She turned to see Stark lean on the wall near Bastet's head. She cocked her head in welcome.

 

"Hey yourself."

 

He smiled at her, and inspected his nails. She usually hung around the stable when she could get the free time. She was getting to know Clint much better, and Steve was officially the cutest thing ever--she was definitely keeping him. She hadn't seen Bruce more than once, and Natasha had been absent as far as she knew, their schedules conflicting. She had yet to see the infamous Hill, who everybody assured was almost always at the stable, but Darcy was pretty sure that was a myth.

 

Stark, though, had a knack for appearing out of nowhere, at any moment, for no apparent reason. She had never seen him ride; he never seemed to do anything than bother Coulson. In fact, if Pepper wasn't around to prove he really was the CEO of one of the biggest company in the country, she would have guessed his job was to try to drive the unflappable teacher up the wall.

 

He smirked at her.

 

"Doing anything tonight?"

 

Darcy frowned and rubbed her hands together to clean them a bit. Then she shook her head.

 

"I'm not?"

 

He beamed at her and gestured vaguely toward Bastet.

 

"Take care of that, and come to the club house."

 

He turned on his heels and damn _skipped_ toward the equipment room. Darcy sighed and returned to Bastet. No one would tell her what was the problem between Stark and Steve, but apparently it ran deep, and as far as Tony was concerned, it extended to all things Steve. Clint simply said it was a family thing and she didn't dare to ask Coulson.

 

She was nearly done already, so it was only a matter of minutes before she brought the mare back into her stall. When she got to the equipment room, Clint was already there, sweeping the floor, humming a song under his breath. She smiled and slapped his ass.

 

She knew he was only humoring her, that he probably heard her approaching from Bastet's stall, but he still gasped in mock surprise and turned around with a hilariously outraged face. She snickered and he grinned in a answer.

 

"So, Hot Stuff, what's Stark's new grand scheme?"

 

Clint shrugged and went back to his sweeping. For all his smartassness and mock protestation, he really seemed to live in fear of Coulson's disapproval. She didn't know what the older man had over the blond, but it certainly got him one hell of a dedicated employee.

 

"God knows. It involves alcohol, though. I saw him bring it up earlier."

 

Darcy rolled her eyes and went to the sink to wash her hands properly, calling over her shoulder.

 

"Stark doesn't ‘involve’ alcohol. Stark _is_ human shaped alcohol. Stark is Man-Alcohol. Stark is the Alcohol-Blob!"

 

"I resent that."

 

They turned toward the stairs where Tony was waiting for them, mock hurt. Darcy rolled her eyes at him.

 

"Are we only the three of us? 'Cause that won't be that much of a party."

 

Clint laughed and clapped her on the back.

 

"Oh thou of little faith."

 

Tony rolled his eyes at them, and waved dismissively.

 

"Of course not, the others are coming. I tried to get the Big Three to come, but they are Big Party Poopers and preferred to do things like 'Run this place, god damn it Stark!' Anyway, the cool beans should be there soon."

 

"Waiting on you Stark."

 

The billionaire yelped and whirled around to face Natasha, who was leaning on the wall two steps over him, a barely-there smirk tugging the corner of her mouth. He flailed at her, eyes as wide as saucers.

 

"How the freaking hell did you get up fucking there!?!"

 

She simply shrugged and climbed until she disappeared. Stark followed her, babbling all the while about ninjas. Darcy turned toward him and stared.

 

"She does that often?"

 

Clint smiled evilly.  "Coulson pays her to do it as often as possible."

 

She blinked at him incredulously.  "Why do I have the feeling Coulson is an evil man who disguise as an accountant?"

 

Clint outright laughed.  "If you're only getting that now, you're not paying enough attention."

 

She laughed and nudged his shoulder as they made their way up.  "What's with the dress shirts anyway?"

 

Clint snorted.  "I'm pretty sure that's a bet with Fury."

 

She paused to consider this.  "How long as it been going on?"

 

Clint pinched his lips not to laugh out loud.  "Over twenty years."

 

She stopped in her tracks, staring at him. He shrugged again.  "They're both pretty stubborn men."

 

She mumbled "No kidding."

 

 In the club house, Tony was busy prepping some kind of portable wet bar, and was currently wrestling with one of the drawers which refused to open and was making distressed blips of protestation. Natasha was staring at him with absolutely no pity in her eyes.

 

"Will you open, you worthless piece of tras-"

 

Clint cocked his head.

 

"What's in it?"

 

Tony stopped and used the top of the shiny bow as an arm rest. He panted his answer as he halfheartedly slapped the monster.

 

"Tequila."

 

Natasha cocked her head.  "I thought Pepper forbid you from drinking tequila again..."

 

Tony turned to stare at the drawer who let out a pathetic little beep. He grumbled something about unfaithful machines and devious PA. Clint snickered.

 

"Why the hell would you install an AI on a portable wet bar?"

 

Tony sniffed at the blond in disdain.  "Stark products will always be at the top of their game."

 

Natasha smirked.  "By refusing to work?"

 

Tony grimaced.  "It was supposed to help parents monitor their kids’ accesses to alcohol but it obviously needs to be tweaked a bit."

 

Darcy snorted.  "I don't know, I think it fulfilled its job description pretty well."

 

The machine beeped happily at her. She skipped to it and stroked the front of the drawer labeled ‘vodka’ and made cooing noises until it opened. She grabbed the first bottle she saw and stalked away before Tony could take it.

 

Natasha extended her hand for it. Darcy handed it over gracefully, certain the red head would be far more competent in fending off Tony's attack then her. The older woman also took the opportunity to take a long sip like it was clear water. Darcy certainly wasn't a stranger to alcohol, but she was impressed nonetheless. Tony spread his arms.  "Ladies! Don't drink before there's food!"

 

Darcy turned around to face him.  "FRANK!!!!!"

 

They all looked at Clint who was doing some kind of giddy little dance, waving something around. Tony and Natasha cursed under their breath, and Darcy frowned at him. After a good minute of flailing and dancing she should have recorded because she would have made some serious money out of it, he stopped long enough for her to see what was in his hand.

 

"Is that a Pegasus?"

 

He nodded enthusiastically.

 

"A single winged Pegasus?"

 

"Yep!"

 

She blinked a few times.  "You just gave the three of us pretty awesome reasons to commit you over a plastic single winged Pegasus named Frank?"

 

He beamed at her, and someone, probably Stark because Natasha was too classy for this shit, snorted loudly. Clint ignored them completely, and Darcy could find no reason to pay attention either.

 

"Why the hell Frank?"

 

Clint rolled his eyes.  "Like in the movie 'Cars'."

 

Darcy blinked again. She thought she had a pretty open mind that could jump to conclusions on next to no firm basis but she failed to see any kind of logic in what Barton was talking about.

 

"Isn't 'Frank' a cow-like car?"

 

Clint seemed elated.  "You've seen 'Cars'?"

 

Darcy nodded.  "Yeah, and I'm pretty sure he was a cow!"

 

Clint shrugged.    "He was."

 

Darcy pointed to the thing in the blond's hand.  "That's a Pegasus. You know. Like a horse."

 

Clint looked helplessly over her shoulder, making Puss in Boots eyes Natasha, Darcy presumed.  "Come on Nat, help me out, she doesn't get it!"

 

Darcy didn't have to turn around to guess the arch of the eyebrow he got from the red head, because she was doing the exact same thing, her hands stuffed in her pockets. Clint sighed in a way that suggested he was infinitely patient for even doing them the favor of explaining this.

 

"It's like in Mulan, when Mushu says 'Dishonor on you! Dishonor on your _cow!_ But he's pointing at her horse!"

 

Darcy stared, mouth hanging open.  "You named a single winged plastic Pegasus after a kid's movie car shaped like a bull, because another children movie character sais 'Dishonor on your cow' while pointing at a horse?"

 

Clint considered this for a moment.  "I was drunk at the time."

 

Darcy huffed, disbelieving.  "Obviously."

 

Tony snorted, and she turned around to see him completely red faced, like he had just been keeping himself from laughing all the while they were arguing. Natasha was simply smiling, and gave a toast to Darcy with her glass. She heard cooing behind her, but firmly decided not to turn, because if Clint really was talking to the Pegasus on top of everything, she might truly commit him. She decided to focus on the two saner people in the room--and wasn't that a scary thought.

 

"And why are we so excited over a plastic toy?"

 

"It's part of the dinosaur game."

 

She looked over at the door where Bruce and Steve just got in, the small blond smiling at her, while the other man nodded somewhat jerkily. Darcy’s brain just stopped processing.

 

"Dinosaur Game!?! It's a fucking Pegasus!"

 

Natasha laughed, an exhale of air somewhat stronger than usual.  "Clint is so deranged, he manages to mess up even the toys he buys."

 

Barton claimed that, "I resent that comment." Everybody steadfastly ignored him.

 

The brunette looked between the four riders.   "And what are the rules?"

 

Bruce shrugged.  "You find a dinosaur, or Frank, you hide it. It must be on the stable's ground, and stalls are off limits, since horses could swallow them. Everything is fair game."

 

Darcy nodded.  "Last thing and I'm probably going to regret asking it, why is 'Frank' missing one wing?"

 

Clint popped out of nowhere and waved the Pegasus around.  "That is the collateral damage of Hill's futile and violent struggle against the Dinosaur Game and its Supreme Truth! Everybody plays The Game and all Dissidents yield in the end! Mwuhahahah!"

 

Darcy stared at him, blinking, while the blond did his best impersonation of an evil laugh—it was worryingly spot on. After a few minutes she managed to find her voice back.  "You are completely nuts. Bonkers. Screaming mad."

 

Bruce snorted, and took a sip of whatever Tony slipped him. He then proceeded to grimace and dump the thing in the sink, ignoring  the billionaire’s protests. Darcy simply hoped the tubing was strong enough to withstand whatever had been in that glass. The dark haired man than turned his wry smile at her.

 

"He hasn't started drinking yet."

 

Darcy didn't have the time to contemplate the possible awesomeness or destructiveness--shut up, it’s totally a word--of a Drunk Clint Barton, before the said man proclaimed "And I shall not 'til Frank is hidden into safety and away from prodding eyes and fingers!" After which he bolted down the stairs and deep in the main hallway. There was a beat of silence before everyone save Natasha dissolved into a heap of laughter, and even the red head cracked a smile wide enough to show some teeth. Darcy panted for a long time before regaining enough breathe to talk.

 

"Oh my god, you're all going to turn me insane."

 

And all of them, as one, stated. "Welcome to S.H.I.E.L.D. Stables."

 

A few minutes later, Clint was back with an ever composed Pepper in tow. Apparently Tony wasn't allowed to drink in an inflammable environment without her, Rodhey, Coulson, Fury or Hill around. Darcy definitely didn't want to know.

 

Tony beamed at his PA and clapped his hands together.

 

"Listen People! I want everyone with a drink in their hand before the next five minutes is out or they get to clean up later!"

 

There was a mad scramble to the bar, indicating that cleaning up later was not something good. Darcy followed at a more sedated paste when she got caught by a petite hand on her upper arm. She turned to face Natasha who simply held out a plastic cup full of a purple liquid. Darcy took it with a dubious look.

 

"How much are my insides going to regret it if I drink that?"

 

The red head simply smiled at her, and Darcy decided that fuck it, she probably needed some serious alcohol to get it through the night, and the older woman looked like she would know some cool mixes.

 

Tony clamored again, after downing his first glass at an impressive speed.

 

"Truth or Dare Time!"

 

Everyone turned as one toward the billionaire.

 

"NO."

 

Darcy blinked at the force of the statement and watched the pretty impressive pout it brought to the genius' face. He spread his hands.  "Come on! We can’t have a proper night of alcohol or debauchery without Truth or Dare!"

 

Pepper sighed.  "We'll have to, because we are not giving you an excuse to dare Steve to run around the stable twice, ever again."

 

Tony pouted even more as Steve glared at them all. Darcy nibbled on her lower lip, before offering in a small voice.  "Never Have I Ever?"

 

Everyone turned to her, arching eyebrows and cocking heads. She stuffed her hands in her pockets and shrugged.

 

"There's no dares in Never Have I Ever..."

 

Tony pursed his lips.  "Steve and Bruce don't drink alcohol."

 

Darcy shrugged again, smirking at him because she felt he was put off that she thought of something he hadn't.  "They'll take apple juice shots and will be the ones to remember everything at the end of the night."

 

Tony sighed and cried out.  "Wonderful, new blackmail material!"

 

But they could all feel it was token resistance. Tony Stark would always be in for hearing embarrassing truths. Which was how they all found themselves seated in a circle on the floor of the club house, each of them with ten shots in front of them. Tony clapped his hands with gusto.

 

"Alright people, rules are simple. You all say something you've never done and if the others have, they have to take a shot. First one without any wins."

 

Steve frowned and leaned forward.  "I thought it was the one with the more left that won."

 

Pepper answered sweetly.  "It is. Tony simply wants to win."

 

The billionaire nodded emphatically, and the strawberry blond finished.

 

"And we won't play it his way."

 

He turned sharply to her with and indignant "Hey!" She simply stared him down.

 

"Tony, changing the rules so that they fit our convenience is the mark of spoiled and brattish children."

 

He then proceeded to prove her point by crossing his arms over his chest in a clear sulking manner and pouted even harder than before.

 

"My alcohol, my rules."

 

Darcy leaned forward with a cheeky grin.  "My game, my rules and we are playing it the right way."

 

Tony stuck his tongue at her.  "Fine, but I start."

 

Everyone shrugged, and waited expectantly, because there couldn't be that much Tony Stark hasn't done. He thought for a moment before sending a sweet look to Pepper.  "Never have I ever worn a thong."

 

Natasha, Pepper and Darcy groaned and glared at him. Clint simply cackled and took one as well. Everyone stared at him, until he shrugged and smirked.  "What can I say, when you've got this great of a butt, it'd be a shame to cover it up!"

 

Darcy snorted, and cocked her head.  "I want proof. Picture or it didn't happen."

 

Clint smirked even wider.  "Sorry, but they got confiscated."

 

The guys shook their heads at him. Pepper claimed it was her turn, and she gave a wicked look at Tony.  "Never have I ever shaved my face."

 

All the boys but Steve took their drink, naturally, but Darcy shouted "Go to Hell!" and took one as well. She didn't look up, but she could see their barely restrained laughter.

 

"I was eight, me and my family went to the circus, and I saw that Bearded Lady, and I decided I wanted to be one when I grew up. My cousin told me I had to shave my face, and I did. It did fuck all, by the way."

 

Clint cackled and shouted with feeling,"Bearded ladies are awesome!"

 

And he hugged her to him. She chuckled but swatted until he let her go, Bruce simply smiled at their antics, and took a thoughtful stance. Everyone tensed. Darcy frowned at Clint. He shrugged and whispered.  "Bruce always as the weirder truth."

 

The curly haired man smiled and leaned back.  "Never have I ever been tied up during sex."

 

Steve turned bright red, and even more so as Pepper, Tony and Clint drank. Darcy smirked at Barton, nudging his shoulder.  "Wearing a thong and being tied up, you got yourself a naughty bastard, Hot Stuff."

 

He leaned forward.  "Jealous, Babe?"

 

She smirked.  "I'd love to be a fly on the wall to see that."

 

Clint pulled back.  "Not going to happen."

 

Natasha was the next one. She didn't even thought about it for a second, having already made her mind.  "Never Have I ever had a crush on one of my school teacher."

 

Everyone save her and Clint took a drink. Darcy looked at him.  "So there is something you haven't done, Blondie."

 

He shrugged, face oddly blank.  "Didn't go much to school."

 

She decided not to push, and he turned toward Natasha, who had had the least drink yet, searching for something she had done and not him.  "Never Have I Ever broke three of someone's rib with one kick."

 

Natasha shrugged and took her drink gracefully. Darcy stared. She knew there was a reason why she was afraid of the woman. The others didn't seem too weirded by this, so she guessed it was of public knowledge, and would therefore not be explained. Surprisingly, the red head leaned side way to look at her, past Clint.

 

"Some rider of another stable tried to mess with Boreas during a competition."

 

She didn't say more and honestly didn't need to. Every rider that had ever loved a horse knew Hell hath no fury like an equestrian whose horse you threaten. They become vicious motherfuckers, and Natasha didn't even look nice to begin with.

 

Darcy knew she was the one after, but there wasn't much to think about. It was as if she knew a lot about them she could use against them. She smirked.

 

"Never Have I ever had sex with a woman."

 

Everyone but her, Steve and Pepper drank, and Natasha sent everyone Looks that stated that no explanation or comments would be offered, and anyone asking for them would regret it. Painfully.

 

Steve was the last one to go, and everyone was pretty relaxed. He smiled innocently at them.

 

"Never Have I Ever ridden at another stable."

 

Everyone stared at him and glared, while they all took a drink. Darcy would have to look out for that little wicked gleam in Steve's eyes. It was back to Tony, and he was getting tipsy, five shots in. And apparently tipsy for Tony meant what little shame he had disappeared completely.

 

"Never Have I Ever fucked myself with a toy."

 

Darcy, Pepper, Natasha and Clint drank calmly. The blond finished and grinned at the genius.

 

"Really, Stark? You look like you would love to have it in your ass."

 

Darcy shouldn’t have forgotten Clint had had even more than Tony. In fact he was the one with the fewest shots left, only four to go. Tony raised his head with a haughty mimic.

 

"Starks are always on top."

 

Everyone rolled their eyes and Pepper spoke.

 

"Never Have I Ever shaved my head."

 

Natasha glared at her, but Pepper simply smiled. Darcy wanted to know where she learned to resist the dark powers of Natasha's eyes. The red head drank calmly and said "Cancer." in a quiet face. Even Stark knew better than to comment.

 

Natasha's turn came.

 

"Never Have I ever convinced a woman I was a fallen angel."

 

Steve chuckled and drank.

 

Clint's turn.  "Never Have I ever had sex on a plane."

 

Tony drank.

 

Darcy's turn.  "Never Have I Ever fantasized about Angelina Jolie."

 

Tony, Bruce and Steve drank, the blond turning red again. Tony complained it was a conspiracy against him.

 

Steve's turn.  "Never Have I ever built a robot."

 

Tony and Bruce drank. Tony threatened to leave the game.

 

Tony's turn.  "Never have I ever cleaned stalls."

 

Clint, Bruce and Darcy and Natasha drank. Clint declared it was ‘so fucking on’ right now.

 

Pepper's turn.  "Never Have I Ever been in detention."

 

Everyone drank. Even Clint, who had apparently been in school enough to get in trouble.

 

Natasha's turn. She smiled at Tony and Clint.  "Never have I ever gotten in trouble with Coulson."

 

They both drank, ending the game with a tie.

 

They continued playing games for hours, cutting on the alcohol intake because no one except Stark considered it to be worth the alcohol poisoning. Darcy laughed and laughed and laughed, and somehow ended at some point cuddled between Natasha, Clint and Steve, as Bruce and Pepper tried to wrangle Tony away from the bar.

 

Later, she walked out, Bruce having offered to drive her home with Steve and Natasha. Pepper and Tony would be leaving together, and Clint apparently lived within  walking distance. She was waiting in the main hallway, petting Bastet's nose, not lighting anything, grateful for the soothing darkness and silence, when she heard footsteps. She turned her head when she heard Clint's voice.

 

"You know you're not subtle?"

 

Tony answered with a snort.  "You know it's not necessarily a bad thing?"

 

"You really need to learn to stay out of people's things."

 

"Are you going to blame me for trying to get her to be comfortable? To be a team player?"

 

"No, but you should give her some time."

 

"She doesn't need time, Barton, she needs to know we won't eat her. Anyway, you were the first one to call her pet names and flirt. If I didn't know you are gay, I'd be asking myself questions."

 

"Which wouldn't be any of your business either. And anyway, there's a difference between me, and the whole team together."

 

She could almost feel Tony's grin.

 

"If she can't deal with us, she better leave now. You know that."

 

"Look Stark, she's a great girl-"

 

"Which is why she'll be fine. Relax, Barton, I've got this."

 

Clint snorted.

 

"You realize that’s not a comfort in any way?"

 

Their footsteps faded away, and Darcy felt herself relax. That didn't stop the huge grin that bloomed on her face, and that stayed the entire ride to her place, with Steve and Bruce, laughing like the two sober men they were.

 


	2. Chapter 2

A few weeks later, Darcy was brushing Boreas after a ride. She was supposed to have a lesson, but Coulson had a meeting of some sort that popped out of nowhere. He seemed infinitely pissed when he called to tell her, which meant he sounded a little bit irritated. She was getting better at Coulson reading, but Clint had said it was because the man wasn't trying very hard. Clint was of the worst sort of party pooper.

She was getting better at Natasha reading too, but noticeably less. Then again, it was Natasha.

She was a fucking boss at mothering Steve without him noticing it. At the very least, without him noticing four hours after the fact. He usually scowled, and that had no other effect than making her coo at him and ruffle his hair.

Tony was ever the loose cannon. She actually got to see him ride the week before. It was rather unlike anything she had seen before. Hephaestus was a twitchy paint horse, and the first half of Tony's lesson was pretty much what you would expect from of couple of nervous and keyed up beings. They were all over the place, and as far from harmonious as one could be. Coulson didn't seem to be bothered though, so it must have been pretty common. Darcy had begun to wonder whether Coulson and Fury would have accepted Tony on the competition team only because of his money, despite all evidence pointing toward the contrary.

But suddenly, like a switch, everything fell into place and the horse and rider were an example of proper, if flashier than usual, dressage. Darcy finally came to terms with why she wasn't on the team. The only one she hadn't seen ride was Clint, and even Natasha said he was great. The red head _wasn't_ one for coddling. Bruce and Goliath were a powerful team, despite their rough edges. Steve and Bastet made it look a dance, delicate and subtle and beautiful. The gray mare was careful with the small blond as she never was with anyone else.

And she was still convinced Hill was a myth. Clint found it hilarious she always managed to miss the one person that was the most at the stable except him and Coulson.

The blond was currently cleaning Ka's stall. Ka stood for Kaguyahime, and she belonged to a woman Darcy had only seen once, named Emma Frost. She found it hilarious a woman named Frost would have a tall white horse, but as she always wore white, it probably wasn't a coincidence. She paused to brush a lock of hair out of her face.

"Is it me or it's been a while since I saw Odysseus?"

The pony liked her and would usually come and welcome her when she arrived, except when he was running from Clint. Since the stable boy was with her, it was obviously not the case. Clint shrugged and grimaced. "He's in his stall."

Darcy stared at him. "What?"

Clint shot a look at her over his shoulder, stating he wasn't happy about it either. Ody in a stall had to be against the laws of nature.

"The woman meeting Coulson is the wife of some important dude or something, and we have to be perfect for some reason. Fury was pretty anal about it."

He stabbed something with his fork harshly, and Darcy cocked her head. Well that certainly explained the cleaner than usual shirt, and the un-torn jeans.

"So that's why I couldn't have a lesson."

Clint nodded but remained silent. Darcy decided not to push. The blond was used to have much free reign over the stable during the day, up until the evening's lessons began. Having to behave and cleanup was clearly not something he was happy about.

Darcy was nearly done cleaning her horse when a car arrived. Her and Clint shared a look and went back to their things. They weren't supposed to get involved after all.

"Excuse me?"

They turned to see a woman in her late forties, dresses far too chic for a stable, with her dark smooth pants and perfectly pressed light pink blouse. She was looking slightly down at them. Darcy felt herself bristle. Okay, maybe she wasn't someone _important,_ but that was no reason to-

Clint interrupted her with a tone that was far more polite than she had ever heard him use, and clearly forced to anyone who knew him.

"How can we help you?"

She turned to look at the man and her eyebrow lift ever so slightly.

"I am looking for Mr. Coulson."

Clint smiled tightly.

"He should be here any minutes now. I could start the tour if you want. I'm Clint Barton."

He offered her his hand, and she sneered at it down her nose. She was about to say something when a shrill yap was heard. They turned toward the sound, and a small ball of fur barged right toward Boreas. Clint and Darcy moved toward the dark horse, because everyone riding at the stable knew he hated dogs. It was too late, though. The horse stood on his hind legs as much as the chains would allow him and stomped down, missing the dog by two inches. It whined shrilly, and the woman cried out. Darcy and Clint cringed. The brunette went to calm down her horse a bit. The woman yelled.

"You little incompetent-!"

It took a few seconds for Darcy to realize she was talking to her.

"I beg your pardon?"

The woman was shaking with fury, her face pale and pointed.

"You're not even able to control your damn horse!"

Darcy bristled. "It not my fault he doesn't like dogs!"

The woman spit out. "Who cares what it likes! It's a horse!"

Clint stepped in, placing himself between Darcy and the woman, voice tight and controlled. "Ma'am, there's a reason why it is indicated at the doors dogs have to be kept on a leash at all times."

She sneered so violently Darcy was worried she would stick like that and blame them for it as well. "My baby is harmless! Your big brute of a horse is the dangerous one."

Clint took a deep breathe. "Ma'am, this is a stable. The horses are our priority, and thus dogs have to be kept on leash."

She leaned forward. "Learn your place, boy. If you had anything useful to say, you wouldn't be mucking stable for a living!"

Clint's whole body clenched and Darcy knew the next thing out of his mouth wouldn't be PC in any way. She went to try and calm him when a calm familiar voice rang out.

"What is the problem here?"

They all turned toward Coulson, who was standing right behind the woman. Somehow, no one had heard him approach. Clint and Darcy opened their mouth to explain, but _she_ beat them to it.

"Who are you?"

He answered in a serene voice, like having middle aged mad woman attack him for no apparent reason was a normal occurrence.

"Phillip Coulson."

She seemed to relax a bit, but squared her shoulders anyway.

"May I ask why you were delayed in our meeting?"

He cocked his head, politely confused.

"I thought you were to arrive at three o'clock."

Darcy shot a brief look at her watch, and saw the woman do the same. It was three sharp. She had to admire Coulson's punctuality. The woman cleared her throat.

"No matter. I have been threatened horribly by your staff!"

She pointed toward the both of them. Darcy opened her mouth to protest, but Clint jabbed her side with his finger. Shut up. She glared at him but obeyed. Coulson didn't even look at them.

"Is that so?"

She straightened.

"Yes! And they tried to murder my dear dog."

Coulson looked briefly at the mutt, and undoubtly noticed the leash-less state of it. He looked up at Boreas. Clint nodded once, sharply. Coulson looked back to the dog.

"I deeply apologize, Ma'am Bardou."

She looked briefly at Clint before turning back.

"You shouldn't keep that kind of crowd in your stable, Mr. Coulson. It will tarnish you reputation."

Clint's head snapped up, and he opened his mouth to defend himself. Coulson sent him a hard look. The blond shut up, but his mouth was closed so tight, Darcy was worried he would break some of his teeth. Mrs Bardou wasn't done though.

"I know a few very qualified people who would be thrilled to take on the job. Very bright young people, promised to great careers."

Coulson cocked his head. "I'll consider them, Ma'am. Thank you."

Clint was so keyed up beside her he was shaking. Coulson looked at him for a brief second. "Barton, please go check on the horses outside."

Darcy, and Clint, knew there was no reason to check on the horses outside, and Darcy was insulted on Clint's behalf Coulson couldn't be bothered to find a better dismissal than _that._ Darcy was never sure how to describe Clint and Coulson's relationship, but it was always respectful, even when it was snarky and dry. Nothing like what was happening at the moment.

Clint nearly growled, but it definitely wouldn't have played in his favor.

"Yes, sir. Right away, sir. Whatever you want, _sir."_

He turned on his heels and exited. Darcy had never heard him sound so blank, so dry, so close to woman watched his departure with a hint of a smile on her face before turning to Coulson again.

"Really, for such a quality establishment, I can't understand why you keep such substandard employees."

And Coulson said nothing. Darcy wanted to jump in, because Clint was an amazing stable boy, always in a good mood, efficient and clean and slightly perfectionistic. Sure his dress sense was lacking, but what the hell, it was a stable for god's sake! But Coulson sent her a hard look, indicating it would be a good moment to shut up and disappear as well. She glared at him but did as she was told, bringing Boreas back in his stall before gathering her things and walking briskly to the club house.

She entertained the idea of finding Clint, but if she knew anything about the man, he would like to have some time by himself to think. Darcy looked at her watch and sighed. Her friend wouldn't be by for another three hours or so to give her a lift. Usually spending three extra hours here didn't bother her, but the idea had just become d a lot less tempting in the last ten minutes.

Still, she took the book she was reading out of her purse and settled herself to read. There was no point in sulking after all.

About an hour later, she heard two people climb the stairs to the club house. Fearing it was Coulson and the crazy lady, she zipped to a corner in which she wouldn't be seen right from the door. There weren't many things in the club house, certainly not any that would interest a snob, so they wouldn't spend too much time up here. Hopefully. She heard someone-that sounded a lot like Coulson-sigh. He sounded weary.

"Look I understand-"

There was a sharp, humorless snort. Darcy closed her eyes and cursed sharply. Clint. Now there was a very, very slight possibility they would go away quickly, and she wasn't sure she wanted to be anywhere near the both of them when they exploded.

"Do you? Do you really?"

Coulson sighed again. "Clint."

Darcy cringed. Coulson never called Clint by his name. It was always Barton, or Mister Barton when he was getting really annoyed.

"Don't Clint me, Coulson! If you understood, you wouldn't have let her wipe her ass with me."

Coulson's answer was drawn. "I had to."

Clint was hissing, and Darcy could almost see him, leaned as close as he could to Coulson, eyes glaring daggers.

"I'm the best fucking Stable Boy you ever had, and you _had to_ let that bitch act like that?"

Coulson's voice seemed nearly eerily, tired and quiet against Clint's. "Her arguments-"

Barton shouted, "Were completely stupid! its written every-fucking-where that you have to keep your dog in leash for that exact fucking reason!"

"You should have handled this differently. Be more poised about it."

Clint sputtered, "And let her beat down Darcy, for something that wasn't her fault in any fucking way?"

"You-"

"I thought we were doing this for the people. The passionate students. And _you_ are ready to let them be walked on by some bimbo with money and a poodle?"

Coulson's voice found some strength, and he sounded a bit more like himself. "She has the power to take our license from us."

There was a beat of silence, and Clint was low when he talked again, tensed and coiled.

"Yeah, so it's fine if she bashes on me then?"

"Of course not."

There was no hesitation in Coulson's voice, but that didn't seem to appease Clint.

"It's fine if she says I'm not good enough, and tell me I'm not worth anything?"

Coulson didn't answer, because there was honestly nothing that he could have said that would have helped matters. Suddenly Clint came into her view, eyes wild, jaw terribly tense. Darcy curled in the smallest ball she could and prayed they wouldn't see her. She had wanted to bolt when they got involved in their argument, and she didn't like at all where it seemed to be heading. Clint turned sharply to face Coulson.

"If she had asked you to fire me to hire one of her preppies, would you have done it?"

Darcy couldn't see Coulson's face, but she decided she didn't want to when she heard his pained and weak tone.

"Clint-"

But the blond wasn't about to let him side step and he leaned forward, his usually attractive and mischievous face distorted by an angry sneer and a hurt pinch between his eyebrows.

"Would you have thrown me out if she demanded it?"

Coulson took a step forward, reaching for Clint's shoulder. The blond took a step back, out of reach, and the older man's fingers curled into thin air. Darcy could guess the outline of his face.

"There would-"

Clint bellowed, "Would you have dumped me for you _precious_ license?"

Coulson placated, "No."

It startled Clint for a moment, enough for the dark haired man to take a deep breath. "No, I wouldn't have. And Fury and she would have had my ass for it."

Clint grimaced bitterly. "So I'm still nothing more than a pain in everyone's ass."

Coulson took a big step forward, in Clint's personal space, but without touching. He tried to catch the younger man's eyes, but the blond looked stubbornly away.

"No, of course not, Clint..."

Clint's voice was ragged, tired. "Maybe I should go back to the circus. At least there I got to wear a mask on the job. Prissy public didn't get to me. And old bitches paid well when they wanted to remind me I didn't matter."

Coulson caught Clint's upper left arm in what looked like a vice-like grip. The blond didn't even twitch, and didn't look at Coulson any more. He continued voice so small Darcy could barely hear it. "I wouldn't be a bother to you great stable any more. You'd have a cute, smart, clean stable boy that could talk with you and Hill about politics in Darfur or something like that. You'd even have a free spot in the team for someone really good."

Coulson made a noise Darcy wasn't even aware a man could do; something between a growl and a whimper. He pushed Clint in the wall so hard the pictures hung to it rattled dangerously. He crowded Clint so closely there was barely an inch of air between their mouths.

Still, his voice rang strong and clear in the stilled silence of the room. It was as if the entire stable was holding its breathe. Darcy was transfixed.

"Clint Barton, if you ever suggest that there would be anyone, anyone we would rather have as a stable boy than you, I'm going to kick your ass so hard you'll feel it until the day you die. Clear?"

Clint whispered. "The woman-"

"Is completely irrelevant."

Clint swallowed fitfully, and whispered hoarsely. "You said Fury-"

"Would be mad that I ever let this become an issue. Everyone likes you, Clint. If you were to go away we'd have a riot on our hands."

Clint didn't answer, but raised trembling hands, unsure of what to do with them. Coulson caught his wrists and pinned them to the wall above them, thus pressing himself completely to Clint, the only part of them not touching was their mouth.

Darcy slapped her two hands over her mouth to keep from squealing. Coulson's words were so quiet Darcy had to strain her ears to catch them. She was nosy, sue her.

"One last thing. Ever consider prostituting yourself again, and I swear I will hunt down everyone man or woman that even looked at you and make sure they will never do it again."

He had barely the time to finish speaking before Clint made something of a broken noise and surged forward to catch Coulson's mouth with his. He twisted his wrists out of the man's grasp, wrapping his arms around his shoulders like an octopus, clearly not intending to ever let go. Coulson returned it in kind grasping Clint's waist and pulling him even closer despite having already no space whatsoever.

Darcy paused. She had given some thought about who could be Clint's boyfriend. She had a lot of time, and well, she already stated she was nosy. Anyway, everyone seemed to know who he was, and every time she asked Natasha or Steve, she only got a small grin in answer, or what sufficed as a grin for Natasha. She was pretty sure it was someone she knew. She thought about Bruce, but despite his being touchy-feely with Tony, he was apparently straight. Steve was also a possibility, but Darcy suspected his feud with Tony burned on UST these times around, and the little man didn't seem the type to go out with someone while pinning for another man. Tony was out for similar reasons, and because there was no way Tony Stark and Clint Barton could ever have a lasting healthy relationship together. Darcy's last guess had been Fury, who she had only seen once, but seemed to like Barton just fine.

However she could safely say she had never, ever considered Coulson. The man looked and acted far too much like a robot for her to associate him with anything remotely romantic and/or sexual.

Apparently she was wrong. Because there was absolutely nothing platonic in the way Coulson was sucking Clint's tongue at the moment.

The blond was a bit shorter than his partner, but he didn't seem bothered by it. If anything, he appreciated the fact that it put his hand just at the right level to grasp the older man's bottom. And he did exactly that, using his leverage on Coulson ass to grind them together.

The man growled and bit at Clint's lower lip. The blond gasped and squeezed Coulson's but in retaliation.

Darcy was getting really hot. Because _that_ was smoking _hot._ Darcy was no stranger to porn; she was a grown woman with a very healthy sex drive and a frustrating difficulty with finding a boyfriend she could hold onto. But _this,_ this beat any of it, any day. The only problem was, she kind of have to face them once to three times a week, so yeah.

She cleared her throat, and that had absolutely no effect at all. Neither of them apparently heard her, as Clint started trailing kissing down Coulson's neck. The older man gladly raised his head, eyes blissfully closed.

Darcy coughed a bit louder, desperate to be acknowledged, because there was no way she reached the door unnoticed, and she preferred to be at a safe distance from the two men when they realized they were offering an impromptu and very appreciated show. Surprisingly, Coulson, who was one of the most spatially aware men she knew, still appeared oblivious.

Clint's eyes, though, flew open to zero in on her. For a moment he looked surprised, than his eyes sparkled. Darcy nearly whimpered. Oh dear god. Clint's eyes rose to Coulson's face, to check the man's state of mind, than back at her. Then he closed his eyes again and tightened his hold even more, wrapping around Coulson completely. Darcy pinched her lips and glared at Clint. Goddamn it Barton, you were supposed to be on her side!

"Fuck you!"

Well, that certainly got Coulson's attention. He startled, and spun around, pushing Clint behind him. His eyes focused on her, far too clear for a man who had been moaning wantonly a second before.

Darcy grinned sheepishly and wriggled her fingers at him. He stared for a second before relaxing his stance. He straightened and tried to do the same to his appearance, but that was pretty most of a lost cause. Clint had messed his hair pretty badly, and the wrinkles in his shirt were screaming 'just got laid'. Darcy was feeling pretty bad for causing the false advertising.

Coulson cleared his throat.

"Miss Lewis."

She swallowed.

"Coulson."

Clint was smirking at her over Coulson's shoulder, and she was displaying impressive maturity as far as she was concerned by not answering with a finger. Coulson seemed at lost as what to say, and the awkwardness didn't sit well with Darcy. She looked away, around the club house. Coulson coughed uncomfortably again, just as Darcy's eyes locked on a piece of colored plastic.

"Miss Lewis."

Coulson tried again, but she paid him no attention, not looking away from the _thing._ Could it be?

"Darcy?"

Apparently she was even worrying Clint at the moment. She shushed them, before jumping and closing her hand around the plastic, finding a red Long Neck. She started jumping around.

"I found one! I found one!"

They both stared at her until she stopped, though Clint was smirking. She stopped and smiled sheepishly as she tucked a free strand behind her ear.

"Sorry. First one."

Coulson was obviously keeping himself with all his might not to roll his eyes.

"It's quite alright. Why-"

She held up her hands.

"Look, if you're about to ask why I haven't said anything? I just want to remind everyone that the both of you came in screaming at each other, and then you proceeded sticking your tongues down each other's throats."

She bounced past them, glaring all the while at Clint. Just as she was about to exit, she turned to look at Coulson, who had the cutest case of red ears she had ever seen. She smiled at him.

"Just for the record, I tried to catch your attention. Clint simply didn't think it appropriate to tell you. Maybe you should ask him about it."

She whirled around. About three steps down, she heard Coulson sigh as Clint chuckled.

"Damn it Clint, I told you not to corrupt new riders."

"I didn't have too much trouble there, boss."

Darcy stuck her tongue out, smirking wickedly. She shouted, "KINKY!"

There was a beat of silent. Then Clint answered in kind, "Go to hell Lewis!"

She chuckled and exited to the stable. She heard hooves and turned to face Odysseus who greeted her with a small neigh. She smiled at him, and carded her fingers through his mane.

"Come on, buddy, let's hide this."

She held out the dinosaur, and walked toward the spot she had found for this purpose a few days after Clint introduced her to the game. She was new to it and no one would tell her the usual hiding places, she could only hope she wasn't taking a usual one. There hadn't been any toys in there ever since she found it so she was hopeful. Outside the stable, she found the old log, and looked around to be sure there wasn't someone around, and tucked it into a nook in the wood.

She went back in the equipment room to wait for her lift, trying not to think about all the times she flirted and was touchy freely with Clint around Coulson. If they weren't awkward about it, there was no reason for her to be.

OOOOOOO

Life had been calm during the winter, the business slowing down as casual riders took a time out, either because they found the weather too cold for their taste or on the contrary because they wanted to practice other winter time sports. The competition team never stopped though, and did their best to uphold the stable's reputation. Clint had finally decided, upon Coulson's strong insistence, which one of the foals he'd be riding this summer, a beautiful dun gelding named Ra. From what Darcy gathered of their arguments-she usually tried to slip away as quick as she could, since it tended to get _heated-_ Clint's main downside was the absence of potential nicknames for a horse named Ra. It apparently restrained his creativity.

Coulson objected that Clint should have no problem if he could simply bother himself to Google 'Ra'. To which Clint answered that _someone_ always managed to distract him when they were at home. And then, yeah, that was the _heated_ part. Not that Coulson would ever do anything when she was there, but it was heavily implied by all parties it'd be preferable if she made herself scarce.

She was still having lessons regularly, getting to know everyone on the team, because despite everyone's assurance she would mainly help Steve, she was pretty sure she wouldn't be left alone between the little man's tests.

It was late march when she walked back into the stable from helping Clint bring some mares to the pasture. The blond was still outside, inspecting a fence he had claimed "Felt wrong." She told him the day you start feeling fences was the day you should get worried about your mental wellbeing, but he simply waved her off with a smirk.

She stepped into the hallway and saw a thin woman talking with Coulson. She smiled, figuring Natasha must have stopped by for some reason. But as she got closer she noticed the woman had dark brown hair she kept in a bun so tight it couldn't be comfortable. Just as Darcy got into hearing distance, she heard her talk to Coulson in a smooth voice.

"He has been allowed to come and go."

Coulson simply cocked his head to the side, voice as bland as it ever was, except when talking to Clint. "Yes, because of your constant affirmations he wouldn't disrupt the functioning of the stable. At the moment, I am pretty sure having a poltergeist around would be less of a bother than this devil."

The woman squared her shoulders. "He would do even more damage if you tried to keep him in a stall."

Coulson cocked a calm eyebrow. "Just this week, he released Hephaestus twice, somehow eaten all the bread Bruce kept in the fridge upstairs and broke a fork."

Darcy couldn't see the woman's face, but she was pretty sure she just rolled her eyes. Then she and Coulson proceeded to try and out-glare each other. They didn't even waver when Tony appeared out of fucking _nowhere,_ waving a plastic pterodactyl and laughing like a loon, disappearing toward the inside ring. Darcy was definitely impressed by that. The woman was the first one to talk.

"He hates being restrained. He would manage to jail break every one if you stuffed him in a stall permanently."

Coulson turned to look at Darcy. "Miss Lewis? What do you think?"

She was frozen for a moment as the woman turned and pinned her down with sharp blue eyes. What was it with the people in this people, who always looked like they could see right through her? She tried in a careful voice. "Taking for granted you're talking about Ody, hm. I like him; he's a great pony, despite his slight terrorist tendencies?"

Coulson glared at her, while the woman smiled a little, a quirk of the lips, looking her over. "So, you're Barton's pet?"

Darcy arched an eyebrow and crossed her arms under her blossom, smiling saucily. "Oh yeah. He always lets me sit on his lap and scratches my belly."

The woman looked unimpressed, but Coulson did that weird little eye twitch that meant he was keeping himself from laughing. The woman didn't even spare him a glance, and extended a hand for Darcy to shake.

"Maria Hill."

Darcy beamed answered enthusiastically. "Oh! That's you! I was wondering whether you were avoiding me!"

Hill smiled in a way that reminded her a bit of Natasha. "Not actively."

Darcy threw her hands in the air. "Impossible! I'm a goddamn gift to frequent. Something must be wrong."

She whirled around to face Coulson, spreading her arms wide. "Do I smell?"

He smirked. "Not any more than usual."

She glared at him. "Oh that's real nice."

"Who smells?"

Clint was back, smiling a bit. He nodded at Hill and smirked at Coulson. Darcy threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and burrowing her face in his neck.

"Baby! No one likes me!"

He hugged her back, but she felt him look inquisitively over her head at the two others. Coulson simply shrugged like there was nothing going on here, and to be fair that was his usual answer to whatever weird thing Darcy could come up with. Hill on the other hand, threw a shrew look at Coulson before turning to Clint.

"Coulson wants to keep Odysseus in a stall."

Clint intake of breathe was so sudden it jostled Darcy, who looked up at his hilariously affronted face. He pointed an accusatory at Coulson. "Blasphemy! Thou dare propose such a terrible thing! Spirits of past ponies will come back to haunt thou! Thou will weep on this day until you lie cold in your grave!"

Coulson arched an eyebrow at him. Just at that moment, they heard the sound of small hoofs cantering on the hard floor. The older man neatly side stepped just in time to escape one of Odysseus head butts. The pony tried to veer or stop, but he still ended barging right in the tower of buckets full of grains, scattering it everywhere. Clint flinched, and Coulson turned toward the two others, eyebrows so high there nearly reached his receding hairline.

They heard a car horn from the front of the stable. Darcy detached herself from Clint.

"On that note, my ride's here. I'll let you settle this amongst yourself."

She nodded toward Coulson and Hill. She whirled around, patting Cling soundly on the ass.

That was the first time she met Maria Hill.

Somehow Hill and Clint managed to convince Coulson to let Odysseus stay outside.

They did have to agree to make him wear a bell around his neck.

OOOOOOOO

May came and brought with it the first competitions. Darcy managed to get her whole weekend off work. When she arrived at the stable on Saturday morning, she only barely managed to step aside from Ody's wild charge because of the bell that still jingled around his neck.

The pony had been hilariously frustrated about it for the first couple of weeks, but had finally accepted it. He was still trying to find a way to get it off, but Coulson was a crafty bastard. It still hung where it was supposed to be.

In retaliation, Hill had snapped a necklace with a bell on it around Clint's neck. The blond had laughed, and since managed to learn how to move without it making any noise. Except when Coulson was around. Then the stable boy made as much noise as possible.

Darcy wasn't sure how exactly they managed to stay together for years, but they were cute. In a 'You are an idiot but I love you anyway' way.

That being said, everything was a mess. Bruce was trying to blend in the walls, more twitchy than usual. Tony was all over the fucking place. Literally, he was running around, jumping over wheelbarrows and enthusiastically driving everyone, and especially Pepper, crazy. Natasha tripped him and swore at him in something that sounded like Russian. Uh, Darcy wouldn't have called that one. She caught Steve just in time to save him from a crazed pony rider, here for his regular lesson, but completely hyped on the nervous energy. Coulson and Hill were trying to do their usual Saturday work despite their team being exceptionally bouncy.

Darcy smiled. The first competition always turned out a mad house. Clint turned to her, bright eyed and red cheeked, a grin eating up his face.

"Baby!"

Darcy was pushing Steve in front of her to make sure no one would try to run him over again, but she beamed at the blond.

"Hey Hot Stuff!"

Steve led her to the equipment room, and they started to pack his stuff, Steve prattling nervously, rereading over and over and over again the list he made beforehand. Darcy rolled her eyes at the little man's revenge on being obligated to stay still and let her do his stuff. If it made him feel better.

They made it to the departure without big problems, until Tony Stark showed up to the trailer without his horse. Which no one noticed, too focused on their own things, until Hephaestus showed up by himself, nudging his rider a bit roughly. Tony yelped and flailed around, turning to face his horse. The paint simply stared back, eyes a bit droll. Everyone but Bruce burst out laughing. Ra, nicknamed Sun since Clint did find some time to Google it, took the opportunity to start trotting in the spot. Clint started cooing at him until he settled again, proving once more _why_ he was the one who showed the young ones.

Darcy let Steve bring his mare himself in the trailer, feeling Bastet would be far more cooperative with him than she would ever be with her. She hitched a ride with Natasha and Clint. Bruce was by himself, at his own volition, preferring to deal with his nerves by himself. Tony and Steve apparently always went together, for a pre-mission argument. Darcy really couldn't wait until they'd finally get together. Clint and Natasha rolled their eyes when she told them. The blond looked at her in the mirror.

"We've been trying for years. Hooked them up once. They only managed to revisit their daddy issues. Don't ask me how. These two are hopeless."

Natasha snorted. "You're one to talk."

Clint glared at her. "Go to hell. I have a boyfriend."

Natasha smirked. "Because we wouldn't leave you to your own devices. Otherwise, you'd still be wallowing in your self-esteem issues."

Clint glared one last time at her before turning to look out the window and ignoring them for the rest of the trip. Both women looked at him while restraining their smirks. Then they proceeded talking about the latest trendy pop star. Neither of them was really into him, but Clint hated the guy with all his heart. Justin Bieber was the bane of his life.

The competition wasn't that far from their stable, and after half an hour, they were there. Clint bounced out of the car, all of his 'bad mood' evaporated instantly. Darcy followed at a more sedate pace, smiling at the man. She and Natashareached the trailer a few second after the blond, who was bouncing on the balls of his feet beside Coulson, who was looking at him fondly. Steve and Tony were ignoring each other, looking at Bruce, who was the first one to take his horse out, Goliath as calm and serene as his rider wasn't.

Steve was next, and Darcy went to start bringing his equipment to his temporary stall. A few minutes later everyone was preparing. Coulson had given them a schedule of when he wanted them in training, and Tony was first. Natasha went to help him, and Darcy stayed with Clint and Steve. She was just exiting Bastet's stall after brushing her, while Steve was cleaning his leathers, when she caught sight of three men approaching. She stared for a moment, before calling out.

"Clint? You wouldn't happen to have a twin brother you haven't told me about?"

The blond's head popped out of Sun's door, and looked at her for a second before following her gaze. He was facing away from her, but she could almost _hear_ his beam when he crooned.

"Will!"

She jumped toward the doppelganger, and wrapped him in a bear hug. After a good minute he released the man and gave manly pat on the back of the two others. A dark skinned woman joined them and said something to Clint that had him barking a laugh. He steered them toward the stall. Up close the mystery man looked even more like Clint, except for his calmer eyes. He was more relaxed, poised like Clint rarely was.

"Guys, this is our new pet, Darcy Lewis. Babe, these are the bastards from IMF."

He pointed to them from left to right, ending with his twin he was still keeping close to him.

"Ethan Hunt, Benji Dunn, Jane Carter and William Brandt."

She smiled weakly at them before looking back between Clint and William Brandt. Barton simply beamed, but the other started shuffling.

"You're not related?"

Brandt shook his head, and Clint popped a "Nope!" Darcy started to smile at the man, who looked surprised at the attention.

"Well, I hope I'll see you around!"

And she turned back toward Steve to see if he needed help. The scrawny man was looking between her and Brandt, before smiling evilly. Don't be fooled by his angel's face, Steve Rogers was a wicked asshole when he was in the mood. She was ready to bet that by the end of the day everyone would be trying to match her with Brandt.

Not that she had anything again the man, because, really, no. But she usually did these things by herself. Then again, she was by herself with Clint and that hadn't led to anything. For obvious reasons, but if her gaydar was that off, she would like someone to tell her. She heard one of the men talk, not sure which since none of them had actually talked to her, but the woman answered, tone low and amused.

"You're just jealous you're not the one she's running after this time."

She didn't hear the answer as the drifted farther to say hi to the rest of the team. Clint leaned into the stall, grin smug.

"Seen something you like, babe?"

She didn't bother looking at him as she cleaned Bastet's hoofs.

"Dunno, is he banging his boss too?"

Clint laughed. "Nope, and I hear he has a thing for busty brunettes."

She glared at him and he bounced away like the loon he was.

"I'll match you, Darcy Lewis! Just you wait!"

When she exited the stall a while later, and she heard him singing _Can you feel the love tonight?_ Well she felt absolutely no qualms about throwing an apple at his head. The thud was immensely satisfying, as was the low string of curses that brought a calm reprimand from Steve.

Later, she was walking away from ring after setting Steve on saddle, she saw Brandt stumbling toward the stalls, carrying what looked like his own weight in various equipment.

She smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear, and skipped toward him. She stopped just as she was level with him. He turned his head for a moment, and his eyes widened slightly. She grinned even wider.

"Hey! Need a hand with that?"

He smiled a bit, eyes more serious than she ever saw Clint's, except that one time with the snob bitch.

"Thank you, Miss Lewis."

He started shuffling his weight to hand some of the things to her, and she stretched her hand to take it.

"Darcy, please. Even my boss doesn't call me Miss Lewis."

He smiled a bit wider. "I am William, then."

She cocked her head. "William? Not Will?"

He shrugged, reorganizing himself to walk. "Most people call me Brandt."

She stared at him. "That's a bit depressing."

He shrugged again. "Military parents. I grew up on a base. Last names were everyone's first names."

She smiled at him. Not that she was told she could see the military in his straight shoulders and carefully blank face.

"Flirting again, Lewis? Are you ever not going to fall for a pretty face?"

Darcy felt dread wash over her, and knew it shown on her face in the way Brandt-William, frowned at her. She closed her eyes tightly. She didn't need to see, to know the almost reptilian prowl of the thin man, and the way his blue eyes were moving endlessly between the both of them, until he found a vantage point where he could observe them both.

"The basest politeness expects one to answer when addressed."

She forced her eyelids open, resting her eyes on William's confused face for a second, before turning toward the black haired man. She sneered.

"And that has always been a terrible concern of yours."

He simply smirked at her in a cold and unpleasant way. His usual way. He turned to William, looking the blond up and down. To his credit, the smaller man stood his ground, despite the tension running through his shoulders. The dark haired man offered a hand.

William shook it gingerly.

"Loki Odinson. Pleased to meet you."

The blond's face remained casually blank.

"William Brandt. I always enjoy meeting new riders. You do ride?"

Loki's lips twitched in amused contempt.

"I am more of an admirer. One can learn truly amazing things about someone while watching him ride."

He turned just a few degrees from William, appearing like he was looking away, but still watching the other man from the corner of his eye. Darcy glared at him with all her might, but he seemed merely entertained. The slimy bastard probably was.

"It is a true joy to see you again, Darcy. Your hasty departure broke our hearts."

He pressed his right hand in his chest, eyes clear and limpid like they never were unless he was lying. Darcy kept her mouth shut, knowing anything she would say in his presence _would_ be used against her. He didn't seem deterred. Darcy wanted to cast Brandt away, but Loki was sure to notice that too.

"Poor Jane lost her very best friend. And Thor, completely crushed. How could you do such a thing?"

Darcy bristled, the only keeping her from jumping at his throat was the unequivocal knowledge it'd be completely useless, slightly embarrassing and absolutely painful.

"You fucking manipulative bastard."

She leaned into his space, eyes staring into his. "At some point someone is going to realize what kind of asshole you are, and I'm going to laugh at you."

He grabbed her arm and pulled her flush to him. "You didn't seem to mind me so much, Darcy..."

A hand gripped Loki's shoulder.

"Let her go."

William's voice was tight and hard. Darcy would probably have shivered if she had been anywhere else than pressed against Loki. The dark haired man turned so that he faced the blond. Darcy could see the smaller man from the corner of her eyes and wanted to vanish of mortification.

"Don't worry, Mister Brandt. Darcy enjoys a firm hand. She _needs_ a strong man to guide her."

William's eyes fleeted between them, and noticed the strain in Darcy's frame, the way she was trying her best to put some distance between her and Loki. His voice was even quieter when he talked again.

"I am sure that whatever discussion you two need to have can be done with more propriety."

Loki merely smiled, and let the hand that wasn't restraining her drifted downward. Darcy yelped, and struggled visibly. He looked down at her, eyes twinkling.

"Don't be like that, sweetheart. _I'll take care of you._ "

She tried to punch him.

"Go to Hell!"

He tightened his hand for a second, making her whimper. Suddenly he was gone. Everything happened so fast she wasn't sure how he did it, but the next thing she knew, William had one of Loki's arm twisted in a way that couldn't be comfortable, and his other forearm pressed against the taller man's throat. Loki's eyes were wide, and for a moment, scared. The blond leaned in and whispered something Darcy couldn't catch. Then he pulled back, letting Loki free of straightening his clothes before leaving.

The brunette brought her arms around her waist to hug herself, looking away. She heard William approach her slowly. Carefully.

"Darcy, are you okay?"

No. No, she wasn't. Of course she wasn't. "Yes. Thank you. You can go. I'm sorry."

She couldn't-wouldn't-see his face, but she could hear a frown in his voice.

"Sorry? Why are you sorry?"

She smiled ruefully. "I'm sorry you had to do this."

She heard him sigh, and he wrapped a light arm around her shoulder.

"Come on, let's get you somewhere you can sit."

She let herself follow him, still looking at her feet. Hers where tucked in beaten up sneakers, the one she used when she went to the stables. He was wearing shiny, freshly greased black leather boots. She felt her face heat up even more.

When he guided her to sit down, it took her an embarrassing amount of time to realize he'd led her in front of Steve's stall, where the other riders of S.H.I.E.L.D. were taking care of their own horses.

"What happened to you?"

She finally looked up, to see Clint Natasha standing behind William, who had seated himself in front of her. She tried to smile, and probably failed miserably.

"It's nothing."

William growled, to her greatest surprise. "That was certainly not _nothing._ Who was he?"

She shook her head again, but that didn't stop Clint from frowning in concern or Natasha from plopping down on the ground next to her, scanning her with her x-ray eyes.

"No one important, don't worry."

But William wasn't to be deterred. "An ex-boyfriend? Where do you know him from?"

She shook her head and looked away. She heard him sigh heavily.

"Look, if you don't want to talk to me, it's fine. But you need to talk to your friends. I don't think it'd be a good idea for you to meet him when you're alone."

He rose to his feet, but she jumped forward to grab his wrist. She still didn't look up, but mumbled under her breathe.

"You can stay. If you want."

He settled back, gaze unwavering on her. Clint and Natasha were silent but she knew them well enough to be certain they were not letting her walk away from there without knowing what happened.

She bit her lower lip and took a deep breath.

"When I was a kid, in New Mexico, I had this awesome best friend, Jane Foster. We went to the same school, ever since we were five. When we were about ten, or eleven, she took a fancy to a guy a bit older than us. We couldn't really approach him at school, so Jane decided to start riding at the stable his parent's owned. She needed a wing woman, so I came with her."

She sighed, and looked at the three of them before letting her eyes drop again.

"Jane didn't really like it, but I did, and I continued riding even after Jane stopped. She only rode a few months, just long enough to snatch Thor. That way I was giving her an _excuse_ to continue coming to the stable. Anyway, so Jane and Thor could get a little intense, and _far_ too sweet, even for eleven years old. So I usually hung out with Thor's younger brother."

She clenched her fists, taking a deep breathes. She almost wished someone to interrupt her, but none of them appeared ready to.

"Loki was a bit weird, but I thought that with parents like his, it was normal. I was pretty stupid. Anyway, I liked him, and when I was fourteen he asked me out. We dated for years. It was... It wasn't good, but I was too young to realize it. He would be rough and harsh and cold and the next day he'd be kind and gentle and perfect. I always made excuse for him. God, I sound like an abused wife."

Clint opened his mouth to say something, but Natasha cut him off with a look. Will was very grim, but he made no motion to speak. Darcy nodded in thanks to Natasha.

"He never hit me, or anything. It would have been too _pedestrian_ for him." she was aware she was sneering, but couldn't bring herself to care and do something about it. "So it continued like that, until we were nineteen. Thor was talking about marrying Jane. Loki was getting more and more distant, never really talking to me until he _needed_ something. One day, to surprise him, I went to his house, knowing Thor and his parents were out. I thought we could enjoy an evening together. So I arrived and looked for him. I heard him talk to someone. I hadn't understand most of what he talked about, still don't honestly. But I did get that he was plotting something to overtake his father's company and push Thor aside."

She pinched her lips, and batted her eyelashes.

"And because I'm stupid, I went to Loki and asked him what it was about. He was livid. He told me he would frame me for whatever he was planning if I didn't do what he told me. That it would be my word against his, and no one would believe a poor girl who couldn't decide on a major in college."

William's hands were clenched in tight fists. Natasha's face was completely blank and Clint was looking away, jaw set so hard she was afraid for him. She hadn't meant to give away so much, but once she started talking, she couldn't stop. It was the first time she told anyone about this.

"After a little more than a year, I decided it was enough. Loki was getting worse and worse, and he was actually going to take over the company. I didn't want to have anything with it, and he was going to make me, so I gathered my things and I moved to New York, without telling him."

She took a shaky breath in.

"I thought I'd be fine here. I thought he'd forget about me. Apparently not."

She stopped talking, because she had no idea what to say. She finally looked up, worried. Natasha seemed to be cursing silently. William was- she couldn't actually tell, but his eyes were flashing in a way that would have been hot under different circumstances. Clint took one long look at her, making sure she was done, before surging forward and wrapped her into a crushing hug. She let herself melt into it. The blond didn't speak, simply held her even tighter.

"Why weren't we invited to the love-in?"

She raised her head to look at the new people. Phil, Tony, Hill and Steve just arrived from the training ground. Tony was going for flippant, but he was clearly concerned, and the three others were clearly worried. Clint jumped, Darcy swaying a little in surprised, until Natasha steadied her. William was still silent.

Clint went directly to Phil, claiming "Phil, we need to talk!" and he grabbed the older man's wrist. Everyone's eyebrows shot up, because Clint never called him Phil in public, but it simply seemed to upset Phil even more.

"Clint?"

Clint simply turned back to Natasha.

"Tasha, will you bring her back home?"

The red head simply nodded gravely. Darcy wasn't quite sure what to do with all the attention. She rarely stood in the spot light. Tony started asking what was going on exactly, but Natasha simply stood up.

"I'll explain."

She looked at Darcy, waiting for an authorization. The brunette nodded mutely. Natasha smiled kindly.

"I'll come and get you when I'm ready to go."

Darcy nodded again, Natasha walked away, gathering the others with her as she went. Darcy bit her lower lip. She threw a shy glance at William, who had still to say something. She wanted to kick something in frustration. Goddamn Loki. Why did he always have to ruin everything?

She rose to her feet.

"I'll try to find Bruce, then."

She turned away, and didn't run, because that would have been undignified, and Darcy was all about class. Especially when she was red in the face from almost crying and her hair was completely messed up from Clint's hug.

Something about it seemed to startle William out of his daze.

"Darcy?"

She ignored him, because she _was_ a coward.

 **"** Darcy!"

Suddenly there was a light hand on her arm, as far from constricting as it could be. She stopped, but didn't turn. The other man's voice was tentative.

 **"** Darcy?"

She turned around, and smiled as well as she could.

"It's okay, William. I get it. You should go."

He slid his hands in his pockets, voice low.

"What if I don't want to?"

She frowned in confusion. He simply shrugged.

"You look nice, Clint likes you, and despite what you seem to think, you're not stupid."

He grinned just a bit, unsure.

"And Loki could come back. I shouldn't leave you alone."

She felt herself smile shyly.

"You're going to be my knight in shining armor?"

He smiled a bit more.

"I doubt you would ever be considered as a damsel in distress."

He offered her his arm and she smiled at him, taking it and letting him lead her to the training ground.

They remained mostly silent, neither of them knowing what to say in this situation, but if Darcy leaned a bit more on his side than strictly necessary, well, no one was going comment upon it. After about half an hour, William's teammate, Ethan if she remembered right, came and asked for William. He looked at her.

"See you tomorrow."

She smiled. "Right. Sleep tight."

He answered in spades. "Right back at you."

And he was gone. Natasha appeared out of nowhere to stand by her side. Darcy didn't even jump. Coulson, Clint and the red head trained that out of her. The other man cocked his head and looked at William's diminishing form.

"Good choice."

Darcy looked at her. "I'm not exactly famous for those."

Natasha turned to look at her. "Of course you are. You chose to stay at S.H.I.E.L.D. That negates anything that came before."

Then she walked off, which Darcy took to mean they were going. She jogged to join the red head. "You guys are insufferable."

Natasha smirked. "It would be more convincing if you weren't about to hug me."

Darcy, who had been convinced she was being stealthy, simply groaned and dropped her arms. "Go to hell."

The other woman chuckled.

OOOOOOOOOOO

Darcy slept fitfully that night, tossing and turning, mind always going back to her time in New Mexico. She had done a pretty good job of stuffing it in a small box tucked in a dark corner of her brain, but Loki's appearance had brought everything out once more. She curled in a ball, gut churning with grief over her severed relationship with Jane, Thor and the rest of her friends.

She was infinitely grateful that Sunday was a competition day instead of her usual day off, because she would probably have spent her day wallowing in self-pity, and she hated when she did that.

Bruce picked her up at dawn, and Darcy was freaking grateful for that, as she was pretty sure no one would have told the curly haired man about what happened the day before. Despite all his calm outside and demeanor, Bruce had anger and stress issues, and the team knew better than upset him even more than the competition already did.

They did the short trip in silence, each of them focused on their own thoughts, grateful for the quiet company of the other.

They were ambushed at the entrance of the field by Tony, who had apparently elected to act as if nothing happened. He was surprisingly successful, if you ignored his over excited speech. Natasha and Clint quickly arrived to take Darcy off his hands, leaving the billionaire with Bruce. The two dark haired men would probably fall into some kind of science talk until they recalled they had something to do.

Darcy ignored Clint's concerned stare, and smiled brightly at them. "I'm going to go help Steve."

And she turned around. She saw the blond open his mouth, but the red head crushed his foot with hers. He yelped but thankfully decided to keep quiet, if only to be able to ride later on. They followed her to the stalls, the horses welcoming them by clamoring for food.

Darcy fell into a frenzy of feeding, watering, brushing, sponging, saddling, and bridling. Except for Clint, no one tried to talk to her, and until about quarter to eleven, she barely had time to think.

The only rider left before the lunch break was Hill, who made it quite clear that "Real riders take care of their horses themselves, Miss Lewis." Darcy had bristled and tried to defend Steve, but the older woman amended before she could speak "As much as their physical condition enables them." The brunette decided to leave her alone.

At the moment, she was standing at the entrance of the path leading to the stalls. She had just seen Tony off, and was wondering what she should do. She could go to the training field, or wait for Bruce to come back-

A then she saw a chestnut horse appear, it's rider talking to a thin blond man beside him. She was about to get out the way when she recognize him as one of the IMF riders. Her eyes jumped to the rider, and she smiled as he turned a bit.

"William!"

He turned sharply toward her voice and beamed when he saw her. The other man-Ben? Bob?-looked between them a few times before catching on and made himself scarce, not without an exaggerated wink at his friend. William simply rolled his eyes at him, and then looked back at her.

He dropped to the ground, walking up to her with his horse behind him. She took a second to admire the way his black jacket highlighted his shoulders before smiling at him.

"Good morning, Darcy."

She pouted a bit. "I can't believe I missed your ride!"

He laughed softly. "I still have another test."

She nodded, eyes lowering a bit, still smiling helplessly. She prayed she wasn't as red as she thought she was. "Right."

He hesitated for a second. "Are you okay?"

She pursed her lips. She wasn't that weak, dammit. It wasn't as if something _big_ happened. "I'm fine."

He seemed troubled. "It's fine if you're shaken, you know."

She whispered. "Why do you care?"

Slowly, oh so slowly, he lifted one of his hand to cup her jaw. His eyes were truly magnificent; with so many colors in them she couldn't begin to describe it. However they were kind and gentle, as was his voice. "Because everyone should."

Darcy shook her head. "Nothing happened. He's just a jerk."

He sighed, and let his hand drop to her shoulder. "What if I hadn't been there? What would have happened then?"

She opened her mouth and closed it a few times. She wished she could say he wouldn't have hurt her. She wished she could say it was his parent's fault, that he was misunderstood. She wished she was still fourteen and naive and stupid. She wished she still believed in miracles and magic. She wished she still knew Loki, that she still could understand him. If she ever had.

She couldn't. Because even if nothing happened she had still been burned, and she couldn't forget that.

So instead she blurted the first thing unrelated to Loki that went through her head.

"Are you free on Friday?"

He froze for a second. "Pardon?"

She started babbling. "Because you seem kind of awesome, and you're very nice to me, and I could climb you like a tree, but I'd like to do this the proper way, so I have to wait for the third date, so we should probably have the first one. And you pretty much said yesterday that you were a bit interested and-"

He cut in.

"Darcy?"

She stopped, panting a bit. He grinned.

"Yes."

Her eyes widened. "Yes?"

He nodded. "Yes. Pick you up at seven."

She nodded emphatically. He smiled a bit wider.

"Brandt?"

They turned toward Ethan who was watching them. The blond smiled at her.

"Have to go. See you later?"

She nodded, still smiling like a loon. "Yeah."

He took a couple steps backward, still looking at her, before turning around.

As soon as he was out of sight, she started jumping around, flailing wildly.

"Darcy?"

Steve, Clint and Natasha were standing behind her, staring. She beamed. "I have a date with William! I have a date with William! I have a date with William!"

Steve and Clint groaned and opened their wallets to hand bills to Natasha, who simply smiled and nodded in thanks to Darcy. The brunette chortled and hung herself around Clint's neck, hugging the crap out of him.

The day was great. Steve, Natasha, Tony and Hill dominated each of their categories. Bruce got a first and a third place, his horse deciding during the second test that he was too tired and lacked energy for most of it. Clint ranked fourth and fifth, but shrugged unconcerned. It was the first time Sun went out, and he seemed to considering the fact his horse decided to eat the plastic plants adorning the ring as the greatest thing ever. Darcy now had quite an adorable picture in her phone of Clint making victorious v's with his fingers while Sun tried to bite through a fake daisy.

Coulson was glowing with pride, and even Fury found it in him to smile, when he came to see them.

William, who was in the same division as Bruce, got away with a second and first place, taking the lead and earning himself playful threats from Tony and Clint. He and Darcy didn't get time by themselves for the rest of the day, except a quick five minutes just as they were going to trade phone numbers.

Darcy slept far better that night.

OOOOOOO

The week after was uneventful, but Darcy didn't find the time to go to the stable before the Friday, having to do extra shifts to make up the ones she missed for the competition.

When she got there, only Clint was around. When she tried to talk to him, he looked tensed and kept bouncing on the balls of his feet. Darcy frowned and cocked her head. "Hey, Hot Stuff, are you okay? You look like you need to pee?"

He went to answer, but stopped himself, beaming over her shoulder. Before she could turn and see what it was about, impossibly wide and strong arms wrapped themselves around her waist. She squealed, but it didn't deter her attacker in anyway, and he proceeded to whirl her around.

"Darcy! You have been terribly missed!"

She froze, and then screamed, "THOR?"

He dropped her on the floor, and she whirled around, to look at him. He was still unbelievably tall, with flowing blond hair to die for and gem blue eyes. She beamed at him and jumped to hug him around the chest-her arms didn't fit. He laughed mightily. After a minute of being held to tight to breathe, they released each other. She went to turn around to ask Clint about it, but was stopped by a mighty slap across her cheek.

She froze again, dumbfounded. Jane was standing in front of her, eyes bright and red rimmed, face scrunched in an obvious effort not to cry. Darcy worried at her lips before murmuring.

"I'm sorry."

Jane broke down, and drew Darcy forcibly in her arms, and Darcy felt her eyes water as her best friend's tears started dripping on her shoulder. Finally, Jane let her go, and Darcy looked around for something to dry her eyes, and suddenly a hand appeared to offer one. She looked up to see William smiling at her. She covered her mouth. "Is it my birthday or something?"

Jane frowned at her, apparently not over her anger. Her voice was cutting and hurt.

"Hardly. We got a call from a man we'd never met in our life telling us my _best friend_ was hiding in New York, because of _Loki."_

Darcy flinched and looked away. "Yeah about that..."

She trailed off, not sure how to continue. Thankfully, Thor was around. He clapped his big hands, drawing everyone's attention to him. "No matter! Let us celebrate this magnificent reunion! Find us alcohol!"

Tony popped in out of nowhere. "Already taken care of! Everybody to the club house! Point Break? Bitch Slap? Double Trouble? You find a dinosaur, you keep your mouth shut, and you give it to me, deal?"

With that he was gone, probably making sure his machine was working before the guests saw it. Darcy turned toward William as they made their way to the club house. "What are you doing here?"

He smiled at her, putting a light hand on the small of her back.

"A spy told me there was a good chance you wouldn't make it to our date. I decided I might as well join in." He hesitated. "You don't mind?"

She answered, not even letting him finish in his haste. "No, not at all!"

He smiled, and suddenly Jane popped between them. Thor was talking with Steve; with Natasha making sure the big blond didn't break the small one. Darcy's friend looked at the both of them, before offering a hand to William. "Jane Foster."

He shook it firmly, smiling.

"William Brandt."

She looked him over, and Darcy rolled her eyes. She knew there was no heat in it; Jane was still head over heels over Thor. However her friend would probably be even more of a guard dog if she really knew what happened with Loki.

"So, how long have you two been together?"

William threw a helpless look at Darcy, and the brunette grumbled. "We were supposed to have our first date tonight."

Jane looked horrified, and promptly disappeared, after throwing a warning look at William. The blond turned to look at Darcy. "Why are all your friends this scary?"

She frowned at him. "Steve's not scary."

William cocked his eyebrow, "I hear he bites."

Darcy laughed and pushed him away.

OOOOOOOO

The evening was fairly uneventful, at the very least on the Stark scale. Thor proved he was still the champion at holding his alcohol and he drank Tony, Clint and Natasha under the table. Darcy had three beers and somehow spent the rest of the evening making out with William. Though he was now officially dubbed Will. You can't continue to call someone _William_ after you've had your tongue in his mouth for over an hour.

Steve took some pretty awesome pictures of Tony wearing a horse bucket on his head, Clint showing off his-admittedly impressive-tattoos, and Thor holding his girlfriend on his shoulder. Jane had the time of her life, switching from prying Darcy off William for a few minutes and hogging Bruce to talk about science.

She'd probably hit it off with Tony when he was sober enough to stop sprouting nonsense about flying and sentient TV remotes.

Around two in the morning, the most sober of them gathered the pizza boxes, and takeout containers to throw them away. Natasha, who had stopped drinking after losing the drinking game to Thor, was mostly functioning again, and helped, while Clint and Tony were trying to keep each other upright, and failing miserably. The door opened, and Coulson stepped in, warned that Clint wouldn't be able to make it home by himself.

Their coach took them all in. Darcy smiled thankfully at him, and he answered with an understanding nod. Then he turned toward Clint, who had abandoned his fruitless efforts and was slouched on the floor, beaming up at his boyfriend.

Coulson bent to pick him up, and Clint started declaring his love to him loudly, before starting an off tune serenade. Once they were upright and facing each other, Coulson declared "You are ridiculous."

Somehow Clint took this as an invitation to kiss the hell out of the older man. Coulson humored me for a few moments, before pulling back and nodding good bye to everyone.

Darcy turned to William, who was tfreading a slow hand through her hair. "I should go."

He cocked his head. "Do you have a lift?"

She shrugged. "I'll call a taxi."

He frowned at her, and helped her up. "Nonsense, I'm driving you."

She beamed up, and let him wrap an arm around her shoulder.

The ride to her apartment was far too short, and the parting kiss left her with her toes curling.

OOOOOOOOOO

Thor and Jane stayed for a week, during which they revealed that they were engaged, but that Darcy-thank god-hadn't missed the wedding. They were also moving to New York in the fall, Jane having being offered a great job there, and Thor desiring to spread his father's company's activity.

Coulson offered him a position at S.H.I.E.L.D. stable right away, which he was happy to accept.

Will and Darcy did get to the third date and beyond, more than happy together, despite the occasional tension between their stables.

Bruce and William finished ex aequo at the end of the season, but Bruce won the finals, as did all the other riders of S.H.I.E.L.D., even Clint, despite needing the first two happenings to get some traction.

Loki got thrown to jail in August, Thor unveiling his scheme of fraud with Tony's and Pepper's help.

Darcy would deny her little happy dance upon hearing the news until her death.

Hill and Fury thought they were all crazy. But then they got hitched while drunk during a trip to Vegas and lost all credibility.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I need your opinion. Should I quit all attemps at being funny, because I'm never really sure it actually works, or is there hope for me? Because as much as I love writing more serious pieces, I like lighter fics once in a while, but if it's really bad, it's probably best I don't post it…
> 
> Greeny

**Author's Note:**

> The dinosaur game doesn't belong to me, sadly, it belongs to emmypenny and samalander, who wrote an amazing fic about it. If you haven't read it yet, you're wrong. The title is from a song in the movie Spirit, stallion of the Cimarron, which once again, if you haven't seen it, you're wrong.


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